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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.discuss both these viwes and give your own opinio.

It is true that, certain people consider in research, business and academic world, one must give maximum of information whereas others say that only indispensable theme to be delivered. I strongly support the former view. I will discuss both views and my opinion in the following paragraphs. On the one hand, in the area of thechnology, business and educational aspects, individual has to give priority to relevant thoughts and ideas. For instance, in this field, they work diligently and value their time preciously. Therefore, public should not contribute redundant points to them. For example, in 2010, a group of researchers conducted a study among prisoners and they reported that the study was successful due to the sincere contribution of ideas from the participants and they provided only relavent information. So, valuable and vital ideas must should be given freely. On the other hand, others think that, spectators must give information as they can. To elucidate further, when scientist gets plethora of ideas, new way for technology opens and further development may happen. For example, each person has their own ideas and feelings. When they share it others get clue for their succeas. In my opinion, it is necessary to share good source of information with people in academic and business world. To recapitulate, some believe that people should share only relevant information however others think that large number of information must be given to the research, business and academic world. I support the latter one.
It is true that, certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider in research,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and academic world, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
give maximum of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
whereas others say that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
indispensable theme to
be delivered
. I
strongly
support the former view. I will discuss both views and my opinion in the following paragraphs.

On the one hand, in the area of
Possible spelling mistake found.
thechnology
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and educational aspects, individual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
give priority to relevant thoughts and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
.
For instance
, in this field, they work
diligently
and value their time
preciously
.
Therefore
, public should not contribute redundant points to them.
For example
, in 2010, a group of researchers conducted a study among
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
prisoners and
they reported that the study was successful due to the sincere contribution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
from the
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
participants and
they provided
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Possible spelling mistake found.
relavent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, valuable and vital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
freely
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, spectators
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
as they can. To elucidate
further
, when scientist
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
, new way for technology opens and
further
development may happen.
For example
, each person has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
and feelings. When they share it others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
clue for their
Possible spelling mistake found.
succeas
. In my opinion, it is necessary to share
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in academic and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
world.

To recapitulate,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should share
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
relevant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
however
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that large number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to the research,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and academic world. I support the latter one.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
245 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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