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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Wemq
Knowledge is wealth and when it is shared its value multiplies. While some people support the free sharing of scientific, academic and business information, in my opinion, some information has to be safeguarded. There are both benefits and drawbacks to sharing information freely. To begin with, information related to medical research can save lives. For example, the swine flu vaccine saved thousands of lives. If the researchers who developed this vaccine had not shared it with others, thousands of people would have perished. In the same way, information related to new technologies should also be shared because it has the power to improve the lives of people. Take, for instance, the case of the internet. It would not have become such a huge success if only a few countries had access to it. Today, the internet connects billions of people living across the world. It enables tens of thousands of small entrepreneurs to earn a living by selling their products or services to buyers all over the world. Needless to say, the sharing of information certainly has many benefits. However, some information cannot be shared because it will endanger the lives of people. For example, information regarding the nuclear weapons or military of a country cannot be shared with others. If enemy countries gain access to that information, it can hurt the security of people living in that country. To conclude, there are certainly many benefits to sharing useful information with others. However, sensitive information pertaining to the safety and security of a country and its people cannot and should not be shared with others.
Knowledge is wealth and when it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
its value multiplies. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
support the free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
of scientific, academic and business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, in my opinion,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be safeguarded
.

There are both benefits and drawbacks to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
freely
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
related to medical research can save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
.
For example
, the swine flu vaccine saved thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. If the researchers who developed this vaccine had not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
it with others, thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would have perished.
In the same way
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
related to new technologies should
also
be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has the power to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Take,
for instance
, the case of the internet. It would not have become such a huge success if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
had access to it.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, the internet connects billions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living across the world. It enables tens of thousands of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
entrepreneurs to earn a living by selling their products or services to buyers all over the world. Needless to say, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
certainly
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
cannot be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will endanger the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
regarding the nuclear weapons or military of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
cannot be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
with others. If enemy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
gain access to that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, it can hurt the security of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in that country.

To conclude
, there are
certainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
with others.
However
, sensitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
pertaining to the safety and security of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot and should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
with others.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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