Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe that it is essential to include physical education classes in the curriculum for all school age children. Others think that children's time is better spent on more academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Some people believe that it is essential to include physical education classes in the curriculum for all school age children. Others think that children's time is better spent on more academic subjects. 1Obq
A number of people argued that it is more vital to spend more time in academic classes rather than in physical activity subjects. In my point of view, I totally disagree with this statement as physical exercise will help in making the student more healthy and pave the road to a career in sports. Foremost, a scholar with good health can make it to school every day and improve their scores. The pupil needs to do exercise regularly to make them fit and active. These days, they are more engaged in indoor activities such as video games and browsing the Internet. At the same time, the availability of open spaces is rare especially in the case of urban areas. Thus, it often leads to obesity and sedentary lifestyles. This hinders them to perform better in school. For instance, research shows that half of the USA's undergraduate are suffering from obesity due to a lack of regular exercises. Additionally, for children who are weak in academic performance and who are more interested in sports, for such graduates, it creates new opportunities. They can have their future goals out of it rather than from the academic fields which they lack real passion. If the school fails to give importance to the non-academic subjects such as sports, these pupils will face crisis and will be affected the most. For example, the majority of well-known sportsmen claimed that they have realised and followed up their interest in sports during school-age. In conclusion, even though a number of people feel that academic subjects are more essential than physical education, I personally feel that having sports classes will bring more advantages to the children due to the fact that it helps in removing physical realetd health problems and create more options for those who are interested in sports.
A number of
people
argued that it is more vital to spend more time in
academic
classes
rather
than in
physical
activity subjects. In my point of view, I
totally
disagree with this statement as
physical
exercise will
help
in making the student more healthy and pave the road to a career in sports.

Foremost, a scholar with
good
health can
make
it to school every day and
improve
their scores. The pupil needs to do exercise
regularly
to
make
them fit and active. These days, they are more engaged in indoor activities such as video games and browsing the Internet. At the same time, the availability of open spaces is rare
especially
in the case of urban areas.
Thus
, it
often
leads to obesity and sedentary lifestyles. This hinders them to perform better in school.
For instance
, research
shows
that half of the USA's undergraduate are suffering from obesity due to a lack of regular exercises.

Additionally
, for children who are weak in
academic
performance and who are more interested in
sports
, for such graduates, it creates new opportunities. They can have their future goals out of it
rather
than from the
academic
fields which they lack real passion. If the school fails to give importance to the non-academic subjects such as
sports
, these pupils will face crisis and will be
affected
the most.
For example
, the majority of well-known sportsmen claimed that they have
realised
and followed up their interest in
sports
during school-age.

In conclusion
,
even though
a number of
people
feel that
academic
subjects are more essential than
physical
education, I
personally
feel that having
sports
classes will bring more advantages to the children due to the fact that it
helps
in removing
physical
realetd
health problems and create more options for those who
are interested
in
sports
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is essential to include physical education classes in the curriculum for all school age children. Others think that children's time is better spent on more academic subjects.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts