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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. P9wp
In this modern era, where individuals are competing for their survival, some people think that it is absolutely fine to keep living in uncomfortable scenarios whereas, some are the sole believers of being determined and working hard to overcome these conditions. This essay will discuss both the views in depth in the subsequent paragraphs and show that indeed working on the betterment of their future is ultimately superior. Accepting and moving on with the scenario people face is comparatively convenient as it does not leave a choice of over burdening yourself with work. Moreover, people who are not of competitive nature do not want to be part of the chase. Accepting the worst situation can be helpful in decreasing the stress and help in maintaining the work-life balance. To exemplify, the person working as a clerk in a small company does not have to overthink and be anxious about the success and greed as he has accepted his fate. Needless to say, Accepting the worst situation is beneficial as it kills the human greed. On the flip side, there is a huge amount of people who want to be the better versions of themselves and improve their conditions for a more secure future. In this competitive world, people are working over time in order for more financial stability. They want to improve themselves. Individuals with never give up attitude often go ahead despite all the problems they are facing. To quote an instance, people who love their jobs are often seen to be more successful as they do their work wholeheartedly. Thus, it goes without saying that one should often try hard in order to overcome the bad phases of their lives. To conclude, people who accept the bad scenarios do live stress free but on the other hand people who work hard to improve those conditions become more successful. In my opinion people who strive hard for success and overcome the situations.
In this modern era, where individuals are competing for their survival,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is
absolutely
fine to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
living in uncomfortable scenarios whereas,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are the sole believers of
being determined
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
to overcome these conditions. This essay will discuss both the views in depth in the subsequent paragraphs and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that
indeed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
on the betterment of their future is
ultimately
superior.

Accepting and moving on with the scenario
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
face is
comparatively
convenient as it does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a choice of over burdening yourself with work.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are not of competitive nature do not want to be part of the chase. Accepting the worst situation can be helpful in decreasing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in maintaining the work-life balance. To exemplify, the person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
as a clerk in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
does not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
overthink and be anxious about the success and greed as he has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
his fate. Needless to say, Accepting the worst situation is beneficial as it kills the human greed.

On the flip side, there is a huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
want to be the better versions of themselves and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their conditions for a more secure future. In this competitive world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
Did you mean "overtime" (=time someone works beyond normal working hours)?
over time
in order for more financial stability. They want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
themselves. Individuals with never give up attitude
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
go ahead despite all the problems they are facing. To quote an instance,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
their jobs are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
to be more successful as they do their work
wholeheartedly
.
Thus
, it goes without saying that one should
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
try
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
in order to overcome the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
phases of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
accept the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
scenarios do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
on the other hand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
those conditions become more successful. In my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
strive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
for success and overcome the situations.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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