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Some people believe that international sporting events are the ideal opportunity to show the world the qualities of the hosting nation. Other believe that these events are mainly a large unjustifiable expense.To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people believe that international sporting events are the ideal opportunity to show the world the qualities of the hosting nation. Other believe that these events are mainly a large unjustifiable expense. Jgpk
When people discuss about the international sports events, they have different opinions some people think that this the best opportunity to show the quality of the hosting national to the world, While other believe it as a large unjustifiable expense. In my opinion, there are many reasons that this best opportunity to show the quality of the hosting national to the world. First, it helps in maintaining friendly relationship with other countries. In the world, a number of country have few tiny misunderstanding with other countries can overcome. For example, the India as a small misunderstanding with America can resolve by hosting international sports events and inviting America. Moreover, by conducting international sports events can easily get attractions from rest of countries. In the world, as few small countries which were less popular than other countries. For instance, Tuvalu was of one the smallest country in the world by conducting international sports events it will get attractions from other country people's and it can increase tourism rate. Finally, international sports events are best opportunity to develop skills for the new players how participates. In each country as it own distinct technique and skills. For example, in Indian cricket team as M. S Dhoni his playing techniques is quite different from other players. by playing or interacting with him other new players can improve their game. In conclusion, that is clear that international sports events is helpful for the hosting nation. The above discussion shows that it is not only building friendly environment with other countries and also increasing the tourism.
When
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people
Did you mean simply "discuss the"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about the
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international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
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events
, they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions
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some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this the best opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the quality of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
national to the
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world
, While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
believe it as a large unjustifiable expense. In my opinion, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons that this best opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the quality of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
national to the world.

First
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in maintaining friendly relationship with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
have few tiny misunderstanding with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can overcome.
For example
, the India as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
misunderstanding with America can resolve by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
and inviting America.
Moreover
, by conducting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attractions from rest of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, as few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
which were less popular than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For instance
, Tuvalu was of one the smallest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
by conducting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attractions from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's and it can increase tourism rate.

Finally
,
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international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
A determiner is probably missing here: "are the best".
are best
opportunity to develop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for the new players how participates. In each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
distinct technique and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For example
, in Indian cricket team as M. S
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dhoni
his playing techniques is quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
players.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
by
playing or interacting with him
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other
new players can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their game.

In conclusion
,
that is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
is helpful for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
nation. The above discussion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
building friendly environment with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and
also
increasing the tourism.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that international sporting events are the ideal opportunity to show the world the qualities of the hosting nation. Other believe that these events are mainly a large unjustifiable expense.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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