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Some people believe that a university degree is essential for success in life, others are of the view that it is not the case anymore. Discus both sides and give your opinion.

Some people believe that a university degree is essential for success in life, others are of the view that it is not the case anymore. Discus both sides and give your opinion. m3KWN
Being successful contributes to many factors. Some suppose success is impossible without a university degree. Whilst others disagree. I believe a university degree can lead people to be successful. I believe success can arise from a university degree for some reason. University creates an environment to develop our knowledge, skills and make us familiar with the latest technologies in our major. Therefore, people with strong credentials are more likely to be recruited in better companies and have well-paid jobs. This not only results in being successful in their career life but also can help them to be successful in their personal life. When people work in good companies they will be able to meet their needs and are treated respectfully in society. These bring them self-esteem. Self-confidence nudge people to be courageous and take every opportunity in their life in order to fulfill their childhood ambitions and achieve their goals. Hence, a university degree helps people achieve factors that be both successful in career and life. On the other hand, some believe a university degree is not necessary for success. They may believe that there are some jobs that do not need a university degree or it does not ensure success. For example, the more an athlete practice, the more he has a chance to be a champion while if another athlete with a high level of education do not exercise hard, he may not be successful. Additionally, to verify their thoughts, they may name some renowned high school dropout billionaires: Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg. However, I believe these people were both few and inherently intelligent and all people are not as much as them clever or lucky to be successful without going to university. Most people have a normal level of IQ and potential that can be flourished under skilled professors’ supervision at university. Thus, they are some works that do not require a degree and famous school leavers people that cause some people believe university degree is not necessary to be successful. To sum up, although some consider a university degree is useless for some jobs and example some successful people abandon school, I believe this idea is wrong since includes a few jobs and people. I think a university degree can help people to have more job opportunities and thereby helping them to real their ambition. So, I think it is still necessary for being successful in life.
Being
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successful
contributes to
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many
factors.
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Some
suppose
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success
is impossible without a
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university
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degree
. Whilst others disagree. I
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believe
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
can lead
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people
to be successful.

I
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believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
can arise from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reason.
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University
creates an environment to develop our knowledge,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us familiar with the latest technologies in our major.
Therefore
,
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people
with strong credentials are more likely to
be recruited
in better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and have well-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. This not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
results in being
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successful
in their career
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life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to be
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successful
in their personal
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life
. When
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people
work in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
they will be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their needs and
are treated
respectfully
in society. These bring them self-esteem. Self-confidence nudge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be courageous and take every opportunity in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in order to fulfill their childhood ambitions and achieve their goals.
Hence
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
achieve factors that be both
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successful
in career and life.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
is not necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. They may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
that do not need a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
or it does not ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
For example
, the more an athlete practice, the more he has a chance to be a champion while if another athlete with a high level of education do not exercise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
, he may not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
.
Additionally
, to verify their thoughts, they may name
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
renowned high school dropout billionaires: Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg.
However
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were both few and
inherently
intelligent and all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not as much as them clever or lucky to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
without going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a normal level of IQ and potential that can
be flourished
under skilled professors’ supervision at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
Thus
, they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
works that do not require a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
school leavers
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people
that cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
is not necessary to be successful.

To sum up, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
consider a
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university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
is useless for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and example
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
abandon school, I
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believe
this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
since includes a few
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jobs
and
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people
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities and thereby helping them to real their ambition.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is
still
necessary for being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that a university degree is essential for success in life, others are of the view that it is not the case anymore. Discus both sides and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
402 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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