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Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that has only a minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that has only a minor influence. wQ2e
Culture is how people are following are traditions, attitude, behaviour, and the standard of living. Some believe that person’s culture is defined by country of origin, while others believe it has minor impact. In this essay we will discuss the both views. Firstly, we will discuss how homeland plays a vital role in individual’s culture. The style of living mainly depends on which country you live. For instance, take India as example and it has plethora of cultures. People follows different cultures. If you take Islamic religion, they speak different language and ladies in their family covers up their self. The way they greet each other and speak is mainly depends on where they born. Few people are very particular to their culture wherever they are staying, and they will follow their own culture. For example, parents will teach their kids what are the ethics, habits, attitude and traditions and it will show major impact in kid’s life. On the other hand, Nowadays people are migrating to other countries for higher studies and jobs and they will settle in other regions other than homeland. So, it shows minor influence on country of origin. Even though people live in same country and they are basically from different places. If we take few people, even though their homeland is India and as they born and brought up in US, so they are adapted to the culture that they are living in. They habituated to that weather, food, and the culture. As they will have holidays according to their respective region and they celebrate it accordingly. It varies what type of people we surrounded by. To conclude that, in my opinion person’s culture is defined by their country of origin.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
is how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are following are traditions, attitude,
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, and the standard of living.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
believe that person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is defined
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
of origin, while others believe it has minor impact. In this essay we will discuss the both views.

Firstly
, we will discuss how homeland plays a vital role in individual’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. The style of living
mainly
depends on which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
For instance
, take India as example and it has plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
follows
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
. If you take Islamic religion, they speak
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
language and ladies in their family covers up their self. The way they greet each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
and speak is
mainly
depends on where they born. Few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
particular to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
wherever they are staying, and they will follow their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
For example
, parents will teach their kids what are the ethics, habits, attitude and traditions and it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
major impact in kid’s life.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, Nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are migrating to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for higher studies and
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
jobs and
they will settle in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
regions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
than homeland.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
minor influence on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
of origin.
Even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in same
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
country and
they are
basically
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places. If we take few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
even though
their homeland is India and as they born and brought up in US,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
are adapted
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
that they are living in. They habituated to that weather, food, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. As they will have holidays according to their respective
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
region and
they celebrate it
accordingly
. It varies what type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we surrounded by.

To conclude
that, in my opinion person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is defined
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
of origin.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that has only a minor influence.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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