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Some people believe it is better to study subjects that have practical applications. Others, however, think it is better to study subjects that are theoretical. Discuss both views v.2

Some people believe it is better to study subjects that have practical applications. Others, however, think it is better to study subjects that are theoretical. 2
The two ways to master any course are applying them in the real world and seeking conceptual. While some individuals think it is significant to learn subjects that can be applied practically, others argue that learning theory is important too. Both the views will be discussed in this essay. By adapting practical courses, an individual can perform more efficiently in the real world as these kind of lessons enhances their brain functionality. This way, they can achieve their ambitions effortlessly. Subjects like maths and science aid students to build their logical skills, which will be helpful to build their future. For instance, doctors are required to have practical knowledge and experience so that they can help patients better. Moreover, adults can calculate their taxes without any assistance if they learn real-time examples in their schooling. Clearly, hands-on training will guide people to accomplish their goals in an effective way. In contrast, people who seek theoretical subjects have the chance to improve their communication skills such as vocabulary and grammar by reading plenty of materials. They could not only learn the concepts in-depth, but can also improve their language by coming across new terminologies. For example, subjects like Literature and Psychology helps in improving English, which is essential to know as it is the most common language in all the nations. In short, theoretical experience in helpful to attain knowledge and in improving soft skills. In conclusion, practical subjects are useful in succeeding people aims, as they would have real experience that is required. Whereas, theory subjects help individuals to communicate better.
The two ways to master any course are applying them in the real world and seeking conceptual. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is significant to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that can
be applied
practically
, others argue that learning theory is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
too. Both the views will
be discussed
in this essay.

By adapting practical courses, an individual can perform more
efficiently
in the real world as
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of lessons enhances their brain functionality. This way, they can achieve their ambitions
effortlessly
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Subjects
like
Possible spelling mistake. 'maths' is British English.
maths
and science aid students to build their logical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, which will be helpful to build their future.
For instance
, doctors
are required
to have practical knowledge and experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
patients better.
Moreover
, adults can calculate their taxes without any assistance if they learn real-time examples in their schooling.
Clearly
, hands-on training will guide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to accomplish their goals
Consider replacing "in an effective way" with the adverb for "effective"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in an effective way
.

In contrast
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who seek theoretical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
have the chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as vocabulary and grammar by reading
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of materials. They could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
learn the concepts in-depth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their language by coming across new terminologies.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
like Literature and Psychology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in improving English, which is essential to know as it is the most common language in all the nations. In short, theoretical experience in helpful to attain knowledge and in improving soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

In conclusion
, practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are useful in succeeding
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aims, as they would have real experience that
is required
.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, theory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
individuals to communicate better.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
A new language is a new life.
Persian Proverb

IELTS essay Some people believe it is better to study subjects that have practical applications. Others, however, think it is better to study subjects that are theoretical. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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