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some government have banned smoking in public places

some government have banned smoking in public places VBPJK
First of all, smkoking effect more health of the human. Not only the smokers but also the community and social. Specially, children is easily influented in the growing stages. For example, in the crowd one person smoke, everyone aroud must suffer cigarettes smoke and they also have risk respiratory disease, cancers. . . Honestly it is proven that cigarettes consist many kind of toxics causing serious harm to a person's healt. the number of people who died each year from smoking with heart diseases, lung cancer. . . Another reason, the smell of cigarettes make everyone around unpleasant and annoying. To illustrate, in the restaurant, cafe or workplace, cigarette smells clinging to food and clothes. It makes them unfortable and the one is implolite to everyone around. In addition to, smoking affect to the environment destroyed day by day by cigarette and making cigarettes. Morever it takes more money for tabacoo production In summary, the government decided correctly in banning smoking in public places. This help the country dicrease death rate caused by tabacco diseases and a positive develpoment.
First of all
,
smkoking
effect more health of the human. Not
only
the smokers
but
also
the community and social.
Specially
, children is
easily
influented
in the growing stages.
For example
, in the crowd one person smoke, everyone
aroud
must
suffer
cigarettes
smoke and
they
also
have
risk
respiratory disease, cancers.
.
.
Honestly
it
is proven
that
cigarettes
consist
many kind
of toxics causing serious harm to a person's
healt
.
the
number of
people
who
died
each year from smoking with heart diseases, lung cancer.
.
.


Another reason, the smell of
cigarettes
make
everyone around unpleasant and annoying. To illustrate, in the restaurant,
cafe
or workplace,
cigarette
smells clinging to food and clothes. It
makes
them
unfortable
and the one is
implolite
to everyone around.
In addition
to, smoking affect to the environment
destroyed
day by day by
cigarette
and making
cigarettes
.
Morever
it takes more money for
tabacoo
production


In summary, the
government
decided
correctly
in banning smoking in public places. This
help
the country
dicrease
death rate caused by
tabacco
diseases and a
positive
develpoment
.
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IELTS essay some government have banned smoking in public places

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
179 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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