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SOME COUNTRIES ACHIEVE INTERNATIONAL SPORTING SUCCESS BY BUILDING SPECIALIZED FACILITY TO TRAIN TOP ATHLETES INSTEAD OF PROVIDING SPORT FACILITY THAT EVERYONE CAN USE. DO U THINK IT’S NEGATIVE/POSITIVE DEVELOPMENT? v.1

SOME COUNTRIES ACHIEVE INTERNATIONAL SPORTING SUCCESS BY BUILDING SPECIALIZED FACILITY TO TRAIN TOP ATHLETES INSTEAD OF PROVIDING SPORT FACILITY THAT EVERYONE CAN USE. DO U THINK IT’S NEGATIVE/POSITIVE DEVELOPMENT? v. 1
Powerful sources of energy have been present on our planet for more than a hundred years. Nevertheless, science is progressing and new types of energy production are emerging. In recent years the demand for solar energy has grown significantly, especially as a source of energy in many houses around the globe, because sunlight is available in most countries. Firstly, there are many benefits of using this type of energy due to which many developing countries starting using a solar power, which has become a better alternative to other forms of energy. The second plus that families can set up solar panels on their roofs and have cheap generators which produces enough electricity to run household appliances. Another key benefit of switching to solar energy is that it is eco-friendly and does not pollute environment. Moreover, solar panels require little maintenance, unlike thermal and hydroelectric power plants, which represents a significant burden on the government budget. On the other had, there are some drawbacks. Solar batteries are quite expensive, and people even with an average material status cannot afford their acquisition. Another reason could be that not all regions receive a sufficient amount of sunshine such as Europe and North America. Thus, fully relying on solar power is not possible for all countries. Therefore in conclusion, pluses much more than minuses. Until now, people are not ready to completely switch to solar power. However in the coming years all technology does not stand still, so in my opinion solar panels become more popularity and it will only increase
Powerful sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
have been present on our planet for more than a hundred years.
Nevertheless
, science is progressing and new types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
production are emerging. In recent years the demand for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
has grown
significantly
,
especially
as a source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
around the globe,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
sunlight is available in most countries.

Firstly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits of using this type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
due to which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
starting using a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
, which has become a better alternative to other forms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
. The second plus that families can set up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
panels on their roofs and have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
generators which produces
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
electricity to run household appliances. Another key benefit of switching to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
is that it is eco-friendly and does not pollute environment.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
panels require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
maintenance, unlike thermal and hydroelectric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
plants, which represents a significant burden on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
budget.

On the other had, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Solar
batteries are quite expensive, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
even with an average material status cannot afford their acquisition. Another reason could be that not all regions receive a sufficient amount of sunshine such as Europe and North America.
Thus
,
fully
relying on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
is not possible for all countries.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
in conclusion
, pluses much more than minuses. Until
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are not ready to completely switch to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
in the coming years all technology does not stand
still
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
in my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solar
panels become more popularity and it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
increase
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay SOME COUNTRIES ACHIEVE INTERNATIONAL SPORTING SUCCESS BY BUILDING SPECIALIZED FACILITY TO TRAIN TOP ATHLETES INSTEAD OF PROVIDING SPORT FACILITY THAT EVERYONE CAN USE. DO U THINK IT’S NEGATIVE/POSITIVE DEVELOPMENT? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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