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Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues. 2JDb
One of the most prominent and important events in the world is the Olympic games, which have been held in different countries every four years. Although some assume that it costs a lot for host countries to develop and build new structures and places, others consider this event as a rare opportunity to collect people from various cultures. Olympics is known as a symbol of peace and being chivalry in competitions. This is an international event and all countries can have a chance to contribute. A considerable amount of people like tourists travel to these places to watch the games. It can make many opportunities for people from various nations to exchange their cultures and make friends. Also, these friendships help people to realize deeply that they can live together peacefully when they communicate with each other. On the other hand, many of these host countries have many less developed areas and they should spend money on developing them. Whereas, many financial sources have been allocated for constructing and renovating the required infrastructures for the games in some main cities. These sources can make significant changes in far lands. For instance, if a production factory is constructed in these regions, many job opportunities will be made for unemployed people. As a result, the standards of living will increase remarkably. To conclude, like all subjects, the Olympics has its benefits and drawbacks. I believe that by controlling and decreasing reasonably the costs for these games, countries can save more money. Consequently, there would be more sources to use to solve different issues.
One of the most prominent and
important
events
in the world is the Olympic
games
, which have
been held
in
different
countries
every four years. Although
some
assume that it costs a lot for host
countries
to develop and build new structures and places, others consider this
event
as a rare opportunity to collect
people
from various cultures.

Olympics
is known
as a symbol of peace and being chivalry in competitions. This is an international
event
and all
countries
can have a chance to contribute. A considerable amount of
people
like tourists travel to these places to
watch
the
games
. It can
make
many
opportunities for
people
from various nations to exchange their cultures and
make
friends.
Also
, these friendships
help
people
to realize
deeply
that they can
live
together
peacefully
when they communicate with each other.

On the other hand
,
many
of these host
countries
have
many
less developed
areas and
they should spend money on developing them. Whereas,
many
financial sources have
been allocated
for constructing and renovating the required infrastructures for the
games
in
some
main cities. These sources can
make
significant
changes
in far lands.
For instance
, if a production factory
is constructed
in these regions,
many
job opportunities will
be made
for unemployed
people
.
As a result
, the standards of living will increase
remarkably
.

To conclude
, like all subjects, the Olympics has its benefits and drawbacks. I believe that by controlling and decreasing
reasonably
the costs for these
games
,
countries
can save more money.
Consequently
, there would be more sources to
use
to solve
different
issues.
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IELTS essay Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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