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Some animals species such as the dinosaur become existent as a result of natural causes extension is a normal part of evil revelation and action should not be taken to prevent this appearance of 2-days endangered animals do you agree or disagree with this statement

Some animals species such as the dinosaur become existent as a result of natural causes extension is a normal part of evil revelation and action should not be taken to prevent this appearance of 2-days endangered animals 7J7p5
It is indeed that extinction and dead are part of natural cycle of life. Due to this, certain species were extincted before the human arrival. Such as, dinosaur. Because, extinction is natural process and there are not any steps ought to be taken to protect the endangered animals at present times. I am not in favour of given nation At the very outset, nowadays, the prime factor of extinction is human activities. Due to this, myriad species are disappearanced. As deforestation is major cause of extinction of animals. Owning to this, plenty of forest cut down for fullfill the needs of mankind. For an example, to make furnitures, papers, windows, doors and cupboards. Due to this, many inhabitants loss their home. So, sometimes, certain species cannot adapt another environment. Therefore, it enables to extinction. Beside this, the another reason is hunting. To explain it, as some individuals have passion to do hunting. So, they kill numerous animals to satisfy their desire of hunting without any reason. To cite an example, a survey was conducted by the government of the UK in 2019, which found that 80 percent of animals become prey of hunters. Hence, some animals only extinct by human involvement On the other hand, there are some other steps that aid the mankind to prevent the endangered species. Firstly, authority should aware the individuals to halt the cutting of trees and protect the forest becomes extinction. As they do some seminars and advertisements on television and radio about factor that impact on human as well as human by cutting the trees. Owning to this, they can learn about causes that are hazardous for them and give helping hand to protect the forest, which assists to alleviate the disappearance of animals. Moreover, lawmakers enforce the plenalty for people who do hunting, which aid to reduction of hunting rate. Thus, it decrease the endangered species. To sum up, I would like to establish that although, it is true that extinction is natural cause. But human interference is also one of the main cause of disappearance of animals. so, there are some measure, which protects the endangered species as Government impose some rules and regulations. Such as penalty on hunting and spread some awareness in individuals to not cut trees on large extent in forest.
It is
indeed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
and dead are part of natural cycle of life. Due to this, certain species
were extincted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
arrival. Such as, dinosaur.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
is natural process and there are not any steps ought to
be taken
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
at present times. I am not in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
nation

At the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
outset, nowadays, the prime factor of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
activities. Due to this, myriad species are
Possible spelling mistake found.
disappearanced
.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
deforestation is major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. Owning to this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down for
Possible spelling mistake found.
fullfill
the needs of mankind. For an example, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
Possible spelling mistake found.
furnitures
, papers, windows, doors and cupboards. Due to this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "inhabitants'" or "inhabitant's"?
inhabitants
loss their home.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, certain species cannot adapt another environment.
Therefore
, it enables to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
. Beside this, the another reason is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals have passion to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they kill numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
to satisfy their desire of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
without any reason. To cite an example, a survey
was conducted
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of the UK in 2019, which found that 80 percent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
become prey of hunters.
Hence
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
extinct by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
involvement

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other steps that aid the mankind to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species.
Firstly
, authority
The word 'aware' is a noun or an adjective. A verb is missing or misspelled, or maybe a comma is missing.
should aware
the individuals to halt the cutting of trees and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
becomes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
. As they do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
seminars and advertisements on television and radio about factor that impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
by cutting the trees. Owning to this, they can learn about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
that are hazardous for them and give helping hand to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
, which assists to alleviate the disappearance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
Moreover
, lawmakers enforce the
Possible spelling mistake found.
plenalty
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
, which aid to reduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
rate.
Thus
, it
Did you mean "decreases"?
decrease
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species.

To sum up, I would like to establish that although, it is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
is natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
interference is
also
one of the main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
of disappearance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measure, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protects
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
impose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations. Such as penalty on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
and spread
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
awareness in individuals to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
trees on large extent in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
.
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IELTS essay Some animals species such as the dinosaur become existent as a result of natural causes extension is a normal part of evil revelation and action should not be taken to prevent this appearance of 2-days endangered animals

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
383 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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