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Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves? oMaD
Some people think that rich countries shall support poor countries by providing adequate food and education, while others argue it is the government’s task to look after its citizens. In my view, wealthy nations be going to support the poor only if there is a scarcity of natural resources in the country. There is no doubt that the government is responsible for the well-being of its citizens. In democratic countries, the government is elected by its people so it is the responsibility of the government to improve the quality of life for the people. The government be going to define long term plans to improve the welfare of the citizens and provide high standard of study for the people. It be going to identify and use the natural resources to improve the economy of the country. Lack of planning will result in poor study and low standard of living. On the other hand, due to inadequate natural resources, a number of countries are unable to raise the standards on their own. Countries like Somalia are affected by severe droughts and water scarcity which make it difficult for people to lead normal lives. In these cases wealthy nations be going to come forward to improve the quality of life. Without their help, the government is unable to meet the basic needs of its people. They are unable to design the long term plan due to the fact of lack of funds and scarcity of natural resources. To conclude, rich countries be going to help the poorer nations only if the later do not have abundant natural resources to support their people. If they have good local resources then it be going to be the concerned government’s responsibility to improve the standard of living for its citizens.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
shall support poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
by providing adequate food and education, while others argue it is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
task to look after its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
. In my view, wealthy nations be going to support the poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if there is a scarcity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
resources in the country.

There is no doubt that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is responsible for the well-being of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
. In democratic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is elected
by its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is the responsibility of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the quality of life for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
be going to define long term plans to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the welfare of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
and provide high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
of study for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. It
Did you mean "is"?
be
going to identify and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
resources to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the economy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. Lack of planning will result in poor study and low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
of living.

On the other hand
, due to inadequate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
resources, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are unable to raise the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standards
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Countries
like Somalia are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by severe droughts and water scarcity which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it difficult for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to lead normal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

In these cases wealthy nations be going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the quality of life. Without their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is unable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the basic needs of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. They are unable to design the long term plan due to the fact of lack of funds and scarcity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
resources.

To conclude
, rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
be going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the poorer nations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if the later do not have abundant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
resources to support their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. If they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
local resources then it
Did you mean "is"?
be
going to be the concerned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
responsibility to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
of living for its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
.
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IELTS essay Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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