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Science and technologies make lifestyle of people more and more similar around the globe? Is it a positive or negative trend ?

Science and technologies make lifestyle of people more and more similar around the globe? Is it a positive or negative trend? K1M9
In introduction, Currently, it is widely believed by an increasing number of individuals that as a result of scientific and electronic components, our life routine has become monotonous. In the following essay, I will consider positive and negative aspects of the statement and provide my point of view. To begin with, world population with an identical lifestyle could pose a threat to the currently prevailing cultural wealth of human civilization. Due to the fact that every country comprise a wide variation in customs and traditions. When a custom is dropped, other aspects of culture such as literature, music, dance, local foods are also at great risk of extinction. As an illustration, song that has become popular in internet sources dominates in many countries, therefore artists start to compose similar music and at the same time folk as well as national songs disappear. Consequently, due to the trend the diversity that makes the humanity fascinating may be lost. Turning to the other side of the argument, by adopting a similar lifestyle people can acquire global problems all over the world through the internet and in addition it helps to broaden your horizons. For instance, if a human meet a foreigner walking a street and suddenly he comes and starts a dialogue you will have something to discuss about such as climate change, political issues. To conclude, despite the fact that scientific and artificial intelligence progresses make the existence of population convenient and enjoyable, I am in favour of the idea of fostering multiplicity in order to emerge innovations.
In introduction,
Currently
, it is
widely
believed by an increasing number of individuals that
as a result
of scientific and electronic components, our life routine has become monotonous. In the following essay, I will consider
positive
and
negative
aspects of the statement and provide my point of view. To
begin
with, world population with an identical lifestyle could pose a threat to the
currently
prevailing cultural wealth of human civilization. Due to the fact that every country comprise a wide variation in customs and traditions. When a custom
is dropped
, other aspects of culture such as literature, music, dance, local foods are
also
at great
risk
of extinction. As an illustration, song that has become popular in internet sources dominates in
many
countries,
therefore
artists
start
to compose similar music and at the same time folk
as well
as national songs disappear.
Consequently
, due to the trend the diversity that
makes
the humanity fascinating may
be lost
.

Turning to the other side of the argument, by adopting a similar lifestyle
people
can acquire global problems all over the world through the internet and
in addition
it
helps
to broaden your horizons.
For instance
, if a human
meet
a foreigner walking a street and
suddenly
he
comes
and
starts
a dialogue you will have something to
discuss about such
as climate
change
, political issues.

To conclude
, despite the fact that scientific and artificial intelligence progresses
make
the existence of population convenient and enjoyable, I am in
favour
of the
idea
of fostering multiplicity in order to emerge innovations.
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IELTS essay Science and technologies make lifestyle of people more and more similar around the globe? Is it a positive or negative trend?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
257 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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