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“ SHOULD COUNTRIES ENCOURAGE TOURISM” ? DISCUSS

“ SHOULD COUNTRIES ENCOURAGE TOURISM”? DISCUSS pa1oD
Nowadays, tourism plays a virtual role and has been one of the sectors that contribute to the country’s economy. Some people claimed that many nations should encourage tourism. Whereas it is obvious tourism brings several benefits to the countries, it is also true to say that it may bring disadvantages as well. One of the main advantages of encouraging tourism is the development of the country’s infrastructure. The desire to attract tourists to a certain area often encourages governments to improve local facilities which are beneficial for both, citizens and tourists. Moreover, many people claim that tourism is an important source of income, which will be new job openings for citizens of the country and reduce the unemployment rate. For instance, a thriving tourist industry implies an increasing need for a variety of services such as hotels, transport, restaurants, and entertainment. This results in a considerable number of jobs being created for people. Finally, tourism allows people to experience other cultures. They may see how foreigners behave, what clothes they wear or what are their customs. On the other hand, some people claim that over-development leads to ugly, crowded tourist spots and environmental damage. Therefore, the development is necessary but it has to be done thoroughly. Not to mention that the impact of tourism may destroy the local way of life. This is caused by people in a country changing their lifestyle, customs, and language in order to more effectively serve visitors. What is more, a country’s economy may become so dependent on tourism that it is weakened especially in the COVID-19 pandemic. In conclusion, no one can deny that there are several benefits and drawbacks when countries encourage tourism. However, I strongly believed that the advantages of encouraging tourism outweigh its disadvantage, which has many great opportunities for the development of the country.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
plays a virtual role and has been one of the sectors that contribute to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
economy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claimed that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations should encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
. Whereas it is obvious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
brings several benefits to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, it is
also
true to say that it may bring disadvantages
as well
.

One of the main advantages of encouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is the development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
infrastructure. The desire to attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to a certain area
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
encourages
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
local facilities which are beneficial for both, citizens and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
source of income, which will be new job openings for citizens of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the unemployment rate.
For instance
, a thriving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
industry implies an increasing need for a variety of services such as hotels, transport, restaurants, and entertainment. This results in a considerable number of jobs
being created
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to experience other cultures. They may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
how foreigners behave, what clothes they wear or what are their customs.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that over-development leads to ugly, crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
spots and environmental damage.
Therefore
, the development is necessary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be done
thoroughly
. Not to mention that the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the local way of life. This
is caused
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
changing their lifestyle, customs, and language in order to more
effectively
serve visitors.
What is more
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
economy may become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
dependent on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
that it
is weakened
especially
in the COVID-19 pandemic.

In conclusion
, no one can deny that there are several benefits and drawbacks when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
.
However
, I
strongly
believed that the advantages of encouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
outweigh its disadvantage, which has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
great opportunities for the development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
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IELTS essay “ SHOULD COUNTRIES ENCOURAGE TOURISM”? DISCUSS

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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