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Shopping online or in real life

Shopping online or in real life 15rqL
Online trading is starting to get as a main option to many of the customers around the world. In my view, yes, online shopping has a lot of pros which can hide its cons, however, the cons can lead to miserable results on the individual and rarely on the community. Shopping through your smart device can be so comfortable in comparison with the traditional way of shopping, due that most of the shoppers prefer online shopping than the traditional way. Having all kinds of products can make virtual shopping easier for the customer, in addition, browsing to find the product you want can save a lot of time in comparison to regular shopping. On the one hand, online shopping appears to have a lot of advantages, on the other hand, it has a lot of disadvantages that no one talks about it unless they experience it and they are not that much of people, for instance, the chance of having your credit card stolen is rare or even not impossible when shopping in a well-known website, however, shopping a suspicious website can rise the chance of stealing your credit card which means people should avoid suspicious websites as much as possible. To conclude, obviously shopping online isn't a bad choice, perhaps, it's a really useful, comfortable and convenient method to keep pace with our generation, but the customer has to be careful about what website he/she is buying from because that can lead to bigger problems that possibly police can't do that much about it.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
trading is starting to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
as a main option to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the customers around the world. In my view, yes,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of pros which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
its cons,
however
, the cons can lead to miserable results on the individual and rarely on the community.

Shopping through your smart device can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
comfortable
in comparison
with the traditional way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
, due that most of the shoppers prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
than the traditional way. Having all kinds of products can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
easier for the customer,
in addition
, browsing to find the product you want can save a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of time
in comparison
to regular shopping.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
appears to have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of advantages,
on the other hand
, it has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of disadvantages that no one talks about it unless they experience
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
it and
they are not that much of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
for instance
, the chance of having your credit card stolen is rare or even not impossible when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
in a well-known
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
website
,
however
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
a suspicious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
website
can rise the chance of stealing your credit card which means
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should avoid suspicious websites as much as possible.

To conclude
,
obviously
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
isn't a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
choice, perhaps, it's a
really
useful, comfortable and convenient method to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
pace with our generation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the customer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be careful about what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
website
he/she is buying from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that can lead to bigger problems that
possibly
police can't do that much about it.
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IELTS essay Shopping online or in real life

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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