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popular event like the Football world cup and other international Sporting occasion are essential in easing International tension releasing patriotic emotion in a safe way to what extent do agree or disagree the this opinion?

popular event like the Football world cup and other international Sporting occasion are essential in easing International tension releasing patriotic emotion in a safe way d6JE
Sports is a symbol of prosperity, wealth of nation. Eminent Sports: Football, Cricket, and other international games is paramount for disappearing stress as well as tension and reducing ancient days emotions in an accurate procedure. I firmly subscribe to the writer notion and reason of ideology is in upcoming paragraph. The predominate justification to support my inclination is that the while playing any sports in which Bonding understanding between players will be upsurged. To explicate, two teams of players have been happened any other unwanted phenomena while playing sports then if a player assist to another team person then it can rise up love and friendship between players. Moreover, between the two countries it has a number of issue regarding any other thing then by organize event of playing Sports like football and cricket and nations teams play face to face with peacefully so, in that way also international occasion aid deteriorate the harness between two countries. To epitome, in 2008, Nepal and China, was the countries who were Enemies in that period however, after appear in multiple of matches of football then it and it understands in of two of that two country has been ameliorated. Furthermore, indirectly individual person can also curtail the stress level whatever stress level is there in their life by watching International matches especially those folks who do not have an adequate time to give them self. Not only the individuals get benefit on the contrary also Sports channel company also get it. For instance, in India, in the period of Indian Premier League A number of masses turn on the channel of sports and enjoy it. Thus, whatever financial burden have of specific Sports channel as well as International teams their can sort out by receiving money from the sports channels TTF. In conclusion, although organizing the globally level of sports and is a crucial one, by take part in with conflict and stressful then it is not any use of entertainment while playing sports of players.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
is a symbol of prosperity, wealth of nation. Eminent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
: Football, Cricket, and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
games is paramount for disappearing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
as well
as tension and reducing ancient days emotions in an accurate procedure. I
firmly
subscribe to the writer notion and reason of ideology is in upcoming paragraph.

The predominate justification to support my inclination is that the while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in which Bonding understanding between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
will
be upsurged
. To explicate, two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teams
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
have
been happened
any other unwanted phenomena while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
then if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
player
assist to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
person then it can rise up
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and friendship between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
.
Moreover
, between the two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
it has a number of issue regarding any other thing then by organize
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
like football and cricket and nations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teams
play face to face with
peacefully
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, in that way
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
occasion aid deteriorate the harness between two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. To epitome, in 2008, Nepal and China, was the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
who were Enemies in that period
however
, after appear in multiple of matches of football then it and it understands in of two of that two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has
been ameliorated
.

Furthermore
,
indirectly
individual person can
also
curtail the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
level whatever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
level is there in their life by watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
matches
especially
those folks who do not have an adequate time to give them self. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
benefit
on the contrary
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it.
For instance
, in India, in the period of Indian Premier League A number of masses turn on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channel
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and enjoy it.
Thus
, whatever financial burden have of specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channel
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teams
their can sort out by receiving money from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channels
TTF.

In conclusion
, although organizing the globally level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and is a crucial one, by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in with conflict and stressful then it is not any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of entertainment while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
.
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IELTS essay popular event like the Football world cup and other international Sporting occasion are essential in easing International tension releasing patriotic emotion in a safe way

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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