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Police officers should not carry guns. do you agree or disagree?

Police officers should not carry guns. jRQVw

Guns are evoking detrimental consequences all over the world. I'm totally against guns and I believe that even police officers should not carry them. The basis of my view are based on several reasons. First of all, it has been common nowadays to hear awful stories related to guns. For example; it has been mentioned in the news, the other day, about a police man who have shooted on a group of teenagers in their car, and unfortunately killed two of them. when the accident was investigated, it turned out that the alleged police man told the teenagers to lower down their music, and when they di. . .

Guns are evoking detrimental consequences all over the world. I'm totally
 against guns and I believe that even police officers should not carry them. The basis of my view are based
 on several reasons.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".First
First of all
, it has been common nowadays to hear awful stories related to guns. For example
; it has been mentioned
 in the news, the other day, about a police This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualresidentcitizen
man
 who have Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "shot", the past tense form of the verb 'shoot'?shotshootershoutedshortedhootedshooed
shooted
 on a group of This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :juvenilesadolescents
teenagers
 in their car, and unfortunately killed two of them. This sentence does not start with an uppercase letterWhen
when
 the accident was investigated
, it turned out that the alleged police This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualresidentcitizen
man
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :informed
told
 the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :juvenilesadolescents
teenagers
 to lower down their music, and when they Possible spelling mistake found.DIDiIdiddoDr
di
. Don't put a space before the full stop.
.
Don't put a space before the full stop.
.

IELTS essay Police officers should not carry guns.

Essay

American English

2 paragraphs

109 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
Include an introduction and conclusion
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.0

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.5

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.0

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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