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Physical education should be omitted from the curriculum so that the students can concentrate on academic subjects.

Physical education should be omitted from the curriculum so that the students can concentrate on academic subjects. yxOq3
On average, non-academic subjects make up two lessons per week. Despite the small number, many people have different views concerning whether we eliminate physical education from school. In my opinion, I support the idea of studying education in physical activity at school. First and foremost, students should enrol in the standard curriculum. It is common knowledge that pupils need to care about both psychology and physiology. In the traditional curriculum, there is a wide variety of both academic and non-academic subjects. It means that learning both of these subjects is essential for the overall development of children. Also, having physical activity at school can provide relaxation and help students concentrate better on academic studies. Moreover, not every youngster have a good head for theoretical knowledge. For instance, a child doesn't need to get an A in maths, physics, chemistry to be a brilliant and famous singer, artist, writer. On the other hand, in some situations, excluding physical subjects from school is appropriate. For example, when you are going to have a big exam that can change your life, it is vital to focus on learning academic subjects to achieve your best result. All in all, I agree that a wholly academic curriculum would be beneficial to some students. But, in my opinion, I believe that non-academic subjects are crucial to most youngsters.
On average, non-academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
up two lessons per week. Despite the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
number,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views concerning whether we eliminate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
education from school. In my opinion, I support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of studying education in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activity at school.

First
and foremost, students should enrol in the standard curriculum. It is common knowledge that pupils need to care about both psychology and physiology. In the traditional curriculum, there is a wide variety of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
and non-academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. It means that learning both of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is essential for the
overall
development of children.
Also
, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activity at school can provide relaxation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
students concentrate better on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
studies.
Moreover
, not every youngster have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
head for theoretical knowledge.
For instance
, a child doesn't need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an A in
Possible spelling mistake. 'maths' is British English.
maths
, physics, chemistry to be a brilliant and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
singer, artist, writer.

On the other hand
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
situations, excluding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
from school is appropriate.
For example
, when you are going to have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
exam that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
your life, it is vital to focus on learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
to achieve your best result.

All in all, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that a wholly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
curriculum would be beneficial to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
students.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, in my opinion, I believe that non-academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are crucial to most youngsters.
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IELTS essay Physical education should be omitted from the curriculum so that the students can concentrate on academic subjects.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
222 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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