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People try to look younger than they really are. What are reasons for this? Is it a positive or a negative trend?

People try to look younger than they really are. What are reasons for this? Is it a positive or a negative trend? KnRO0
Most people tend trying to look under their age. This situation reasoned with growing of life expectancy followed by increasing both the age of marriage and the age of retirement. There is nothing negative here, because not only do they have a better chance to build relationship if look younger but they have more opportunities for employment. First of all, far back in the past life expectancy of men was about two times shorter. So in teen age they would considered as adults. At the age of fifteen and younger people used to get married and till the age of forty most of them died being already very old. Today due to technological progress and development of medecine peolple live longer. It influenced on all spheres of life including age of marriage. Many today prefer to create a family at the age above thirty. That is why to be more attractive they have to care about their appearence more carefuly then the ancestors trying to look under their real age. Another advantage of being look younger is that the person who look young and full of energy has a higher chance to get be hired than the opponent with the same skills and experience who look older. Moreover many of working positions today demand to work with a client face to face so young-looking candidates are more preffered. There is no doubth that in the long run people of age fifty and and even more will be considered as young due to possibility to look so. In conclusion, people's aspiration to look younger reasoned by increasing leight of their lifes, that is just a part and parcel of evolution of our civilization.
Most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend trying to
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look
under their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
. This situation reasoned with growing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy followed by increasing both the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
age


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
of
marriage and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of retirement. There is nothing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
here,
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because
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do they have a better chance to build relationship
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
if


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
look
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they have more opportunities for employment.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, far back in the past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
was about two times shorter.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
in teen
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age
they would
The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: "consider"
considered
as adults.

At the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of fifteen and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
married and till the
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age
of forty most of them
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died
being already
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very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.
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Today
due

to technological progress and development of
Possible spelling mistake found.
medecine
Possible spelling mistake found.
peolple
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer. It influenced on all spheres of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of marriage.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
prefer to create a family at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
above thirty.
That is
why to be more attractive they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
care about their
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
appearence


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
more
Possible spelling mistake found.
carefuly
then the ancestors trying to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
under their real age.

Another advantage of being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
is that the person who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
young and full of energy has a higher chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
be hired


Did you mean "Then"?
than
the opponent with the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and experience who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
older.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of working positions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
demand to work

with a client face to face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
young-looking candidates are more
Possible spelling mistake found.
preffered
. There is no
Possible spelling mistake found.
doubth
that in the long run
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
fifty

Possible typo: you repeated a word
and and
even more will
be considered
as young due to possibility to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's aspiration to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
reasoned by increasing
Possible spelling mistake found.
leight
of their
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "lives", the plural form of the noun 'life'?
lifes
,
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a part and parcel of evolution

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
of
our civilization.
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IELTS essay People try to look younger than they really are. What are reasons for this? Is it a positive or a negative trend?

Essay
  American English
11 paragraphs
282 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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