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Nowadays it is easier to maintain good health than in the past

Nowadays it is easier to maintain good health than in the past kYL1n
Good health comes from the kind of food that we eat in our everyday diet or better saying the consumption of necessary nutrients for our body. Some people may say that in the past they had a better health. However, others think otherwise. They believe that it is easier to keep up the good health based on technologies advancements. It is also agreeable that is easier to maintain the health in a good stated through organic food. Firstly, in the past we did not have gyms to go to work out. There were no other alternatives to exercise except only through walking. But, currently, we have not only parks but gyms spread all around the world. We also have nutrients found in supplements. For instance, in every gym in my country after finishing the training they give us such supplements to complement our dairy diet. Then, it makes me feel strong enough to accomplish my further tasks. Secondly, we can grow our own food. Sowing organic vegetables is one of the best way to keep away from parasites, needless to mention about agrotoxic which razes our body. However, in the past people used to have a very soft life. It was not like it is today an amok life. nowadays what we are facing it is wholeheartedly a state of chaos. We do not have time to do leisure activities. All that we have to do is only work. Even after having finishing working at the office we still keep ou duties up at home. Some people do not stop working even during the weekend. Therefore, what it was supposed to do in the office it was made in there nothing else. Finally, with all the technology advancements that we have today and with the further advancements which are supposed to come up our health will likely be easily maintained and we will be able produce our food with high quality.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from the kind of food that we eat in our everyday diet or better saying the consumption of necessary nutrients for our body.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may say that in the past they had a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
However
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
otherwise
. They believe that it is easier to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
based on technologies advancements. It is
also
agreeable
that is
easier to maintain the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
stated through organic food.

Firstly
, in the past we did not have gyms to go to work out. There were no other alternatives to exercise except
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
through walking.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
currently
, we have not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
parks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
gyms spread all around the world. We
also
have nutrients found in supplements.
For instance
, in every gym in my country after finishing the training they give us such supplements to complement our dairy diet. Then, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me feel strong
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to accomplish my
further
tasks.

Secondly
, we can grow our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
food. Sowing organic vegetables is one of the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
away from parasites, needless to
Did you mean simply "mention agrotoxic"? You do not need the word "about" here.
mention about agrotoxic
which razes our body.

However
, in the past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
soft life. It was not like it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
an amok life.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
nowadays
what we are facing it is
wholeheartedly
a state of chaos. We do not have time to do leisure activities. All that we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
work.
“Even after” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Even after
having finishing working at the office we
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
Possible spelling mistake found.
ou
duties up at home.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
working even during the weekend.
Therefore
, what it
was supposed
to do in the office it
was made
in there nothing else.

Finally
, with all the technology advancements that we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
and with the
further
advancements which
are supposed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
will likely be
easily
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
maintained and
we will be
The preposition 'to' is required in front of the verb 'produce'.
able produce
our food with high quality.
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IELTS essay Nowadays it is easier to maintain good health than in the past

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
321 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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