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people think traveling abroad is beneficial, some says that our country have its own internet and facilites. discuss both views and give your opinion

people think traveling abroad is beneficial, some says that our country have its own internet and facilites. discuss both views and give your opinion 56DGm
Nowadays, travelling abroad is becoming very popular among people. Many persons thinks that travel to abroad is very beneficial in varioua aspects, while many contradicts that this is unnecessary beacuse we have many optoins in our country as well. In this essay I am discussing both the sides including my opinion. Firstly, visiting various countries have advantageous. Different-different continents have wast variety of culture, knowledge, facilities like internet speed, transport. in addition to that, most of the developed nation have uper hand in many things as compared to the developing nations. Forinstance, like Australia is a developed nation and in many facilites it provieds better availability as compare to the country like India which is currently in developing phase. Developed nations provides always better options. Secondaly, staying in our origion hometown has also very benefits, in our home country we are not spending majority of money to get access to various thing and all the facilites are easliy available. Forexample, people are not spending there money to get explore to other countries culture because they have their own internet and Tv through which they easily explore many option for free of cost. In country like India, although it is developing but it provides very high quality of life and world class facilites. To conclude that, visitng abroad have their own benefits whereas staying in home country have their own advantage. In my opinion, lives in in place like in own origion country has more better than travelling to other countries.
Nowadays, travelling abroad is becoming
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
persons
You should probably use "think".
thinks
that travel to abroad is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial in
Possible spelling mistake found.
varioua
aspects, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
contradicts that this is unnecessary
Possible spelling mistake found.
beacuse
we have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
optoins
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as well
. In this essay I am discussing both the sides including my opinion.

Firstly
, visiting various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have advantageous.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
continents have
Use past participle here: "been".
wast
variety of culture, knowledge, facilities like internet speed, transport.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
addition to that, most of the developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
have
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "upper", the comparative form of the adjective 'up'?
uper
hand in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things as compared to the developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Forinstance
, like Australia is a developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
and in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
facilites
it
Possible spelling mistake found.
provieds
better availability as compare to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
like India which is
currently
in developing phase. Developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
provides always better options.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Secondaly
, staying in our
Possible spelling mistake found.
origion
hometown has
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
benefits, in our home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
we are not spending
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
access to various thing and all the
Possible spelling mistake found.
facilites
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
easliy
available.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Forexample
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are not spending there money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
explore to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
culture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
internet and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tv
through which they
easily
explore
Possible agreement error. The noun option seems to be countable; consider using: "many options".
many option
for free of cost. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
like India, although it is developing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it provides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high quality of life and world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
Possible spelling mistake found.
facilites
.

To conclude
that,
Possible spelling mistake found.
visitng
abroad have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits whereas staying in home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantage. In my opinion,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
Possible typo: you repeated a word
in in
place like in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Possible spelling mistake found.
origion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has
Use only "better" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more better
than travelling to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
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IELTS essay people think traveling abroad is beneficial, some says that our country have its own internet and facilites. discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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