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People nowadays tend to shop online instead of going to physical stores. Is this a positive or a negative development?

People nowadays tend to shop online instead of going to physical stores. Is this a positive or a negative development? 3bOgw
There has been a steady increase in the popularity of purchasing online than traditional shopping trend by many people, whereas some individual believe it to be a delusive idea. However, I consider this development as positive, due to plenty of benefits than potential drawbacks. To begin with, Electronic shopping has outstanding advantages in time saving matter, it is generally considered to be more convenient for customers compared to buying items in physical store for the reason that they are able to purchase the merchandise they need anytime within the comforts of their home using digital platforms and mobile applications. Hence, such ease and convenience it allow the people to save time and energy when shopping. Furthermore, online stores tend to offer alluring prices probably because they have lower overhead costs. This allows them to sell items for deeply discounted value. Retail and wholesale products sold over the internet are considerably cheaper compared to those available in malls and other physical stores. These online merchants are able to significantly reduce the prices of the products they sell because they do not have to worry about paying for rental, manpower, advertisement and other overheads. This can lead to major cost benefits for both shoppers and traders. Finally, Online shopping have an extensive range of products other than in physical stores. Apart from more choices, there are websites such as ebays, amazon and ali express that feature previous customer’s reviews and testimonials, which can help consumers to select the best products based on their needs and standards. Some online stores even offer discounts, rewards, voucher, bundles, and other promotions, making sure that their customers get to pick the best products at the most affordable prices. In conclusion, online shopping offers greater benefits to customers when compared to in-store purchasing. Clearly, this is not only a hassle-free modality to shop but also one that can help people make better decisions and save them so much money. Therefore, I think this is definitely a positive trend and the popularity of online shopping is likely to continue.
There has been a steady increase in the popularity of purchasing
Use "onliner" to make a comparison with this adjective.
online
than traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
trend by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "individuals"?
individual
believe it to be a delusive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
However
, I consider this development as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
, due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of benefits than potential drawbacks.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, Electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has outstanding advantages in time saving matter, it is
generally
considered to be more convenient for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
compared to buying items in physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
for the reason that they are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
the merchandise they need anytime within the comforts of their home using digital platforms and mobile applications.
Hence
, such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
and convenience it
Did you mean "allows"?
allow
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to save time and energy when shopping.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
tend to offer alluring prices
probably
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have lower overhead costs. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to sell items for
deeply
discounted value. Retail and wholesale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
sold over the internet are
considerably
cheaper compared to those available in malls and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
merchants are able to
significantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the prices of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
they sell
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worry about paying for rental, manpower, advertisement and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
overheads. This can lead to major cost benefits for both shoppers and traders.

Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
have an extensive range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
than in physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
. Apart from more choices, there are websites such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
ebays
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
amazon
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
ali
express that feature previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer’s
reviews and testimonials, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
consumers to select the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
based on their needs and standards.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
even offer discounts, rewards, voucher, bundles, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
promotions, making sure that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to pick the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
at the most affordable prices.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
offers greater benefits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
when compared to in-store purchasing.
Clearly
, this is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a hassle-free modality to shop
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
one that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people


This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
better decisions and save them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much money.
Therefore
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this is definitely a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
trend and the popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is likely to continue.

IELTS essay People nowadays tend to shop online instead of going to physical stores. Is this a positive or a negative development?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
341 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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