Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

People are having more and more sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons? What can be done to make people drink less?

People are having more and more sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons? What can be done to make people drink less? wm9En
It is true that the consumption of sweetened beverages is increasing exponentially. Although this trend can be attributed to a host of reasons, there are several feasible solutions to reduce the intake of sugary drinks. Heavy marketing, as well as affordable prices are the principal reasons why the consumption of sweetened drinks increased rapidly. In terms of advertising, the soft drink manufacturers aim at their target audience of children and adolescents who can be easily swayed to purchase goods impulsively owing to their young age. Secondly, thanks to a free-trade agreement of the authorities in some nations, the prices of drinks including the high concentration of sugar are not exorbitant, therefore citizens can afford them more easily when compared to other types of drinks. If inhabitants insist on using more and more sweetened drinks, it might have a detrimental effect on their health including life-threatening conditions such as diabetes and obesity. On the other hand, those mentioned causes can be tackled by two measures suggested above. Firstly, health awareness campaigns should be launched by the authorities on television as well as social outlets. If the government propagates more healthy products advertisements aiming at children, the number of youngsters consuming sugary beverages would decline. Secondly, raising taxes on the sales of high-sugar drinks is necessary to reduce the consumption of sugary drinks. This has been done in France, for example, taxation of sugar-based drinks in this nation was increased in 2012. As a result, there was a decline in the figure for dwellers using sugary drinks in France. From that, heavy taxes should be imposed on sugary beverages in other countries to curb the large intake of high-sugar drinks. In conclusion, although various factors are leading to the growth in the use of sugary drinks, those suggested effective approaches can be implemented to reverse this trend.
It is true that the consumption of sweetened beverages is increasing
exponentially
. Although this trend can
be attributed
to a host of reasons, there are several feasible solutions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the intake of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
drinks.

Heavy marketing,
as well
as affordable prices are the principal reasons why the consumption of sweetened
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
increased
rapidly
. In terms of advertising, the soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
manufacturers aim at their target audience of children and adolescents who can be
easily
swayed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
impulsively
owing to their young age.
Secondly
, thanks to a free-trade agreement of the authorities in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nations, the prices of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
including the high concentration of sugar are not exorbitant,
therefore
citizens can afford them more
easily
when compared to other types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
. If inhabitants insist on using more and more sweetened
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
, it might have a detrimental effect on their health including life-threatening conditions such as diabetes and obesity.

On the other hand
, those mentioned causes can
be tackled
by two measures suggested above.
Firstly
, health awareness campaigns should
be launched
by the authorities on television
as well
as social outlets. If the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
propagates more healthy products advertisements aiming at children, the number of youngsters consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
beverages would decline.
Secondly
, raising taxes on the sales of high-sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
. This has
been done
in France,
for example
, taxation of sugar-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
in this nation
was increased
in 2012.
As a result
, there was a decline in the figure for dwellers using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
in France. From that, heavy taxes should
be imposed
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
beverages in other countries to curb the large intake of high-sugar drinks.

In conclusion
, although various factors are leading to the growth in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
, those suggested effective approaches can
be implemented
to reverse this trend.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay People are having more and more sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons? What can be done to make people drink less?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • People are having more and more sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons? What can be done to make people drink less?