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People are having more and more sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons? What are the solutions to make people drink less. You should write at least 254 words.

People are having more and more sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons? What are the solutions to make people drink less. L1MG
In this day and age, there are several diseases from consumed too much sugar like obesity and diabetes has drawn a lot of attention from the public. However, a bunch of people still having huge volume of sugar-based drinks. This trend is attributed to some factors and it should be dealt with by some viable solutions which will demonstrate in this essay. Firstly, we could not deny that the taste of some drinks contained much sugar is really delicious and as well as could attract a lot of consumers. In addition, it was obviously seen that the sugar-based drinks which is honestly convinient and also their prices are cheaper than another drinks. For example, when we held the big party or in some festivals, the sweet drinks are really essential for gain enough energy to countinue to play. However, it is the pressing problem that we need to find solutions due to the fact that it could be lead to a plenty of seriously diseases. The government should limit some companies to distribute a large of sugar-based drinks such as pepsi or coca-cola. Instead of that, we should actively launch fruit juice campaigns and make people aware of the seriousness of drinking too much soft drink. Furthermore, each person should love themselve by set up a healthy diet without too much sweet things. In a nutshell, the sugar-based drinks are indispensable in life but consuming too much will affect our health and that can be solved if we try to change.
In this day and age, there are several diseases from consumed too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
sugar like obesity and diabetes has drawn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
attention from the public.
However
, a bunch of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
still
having huge volume of sugar-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
. This trend
is attributed
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
factors and it should
be dealt
with by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
viable solutions which will demonstrate in this essay.

Firstly
, we could not deny that the taste of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
contained
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
sugar is
really
delicious and
as well
as could attract
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
consumers.
In addition
, it was
obviously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the sugar-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
which is
honestly
Possible spelling mistake found.
convinient
and
also
their prices are cheaper than another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
.
For example
, when we held the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
party or in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
festivals, the sweet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
are
really
essential for gain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
energy to
Possible spelling mistake found.
countinue
to play.

However
, it is the pressing problem that we need to find solutions due to the fact that it could be lead to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
seriously
diseases. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should limit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to distribute a large of sugar-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
pepsi
or coca-cola.
Instead
of that, we should
actively
launch fruit juice campaigns and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aware of the seriousness of drinking too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
.
Furthermore
, each person should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Possible spelling mistake found.
themselve
by set up a healthy diet without too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
sweet things.

In a nutshell, the sugar-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
are indispensable in life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
consuming too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
will affect our health and that can
be solved
if we try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.
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IELTS essay People are having more and more sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons? What are the solutions to make people drink less.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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