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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents should not allow their children to watch television.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Parents should not allow their children to watch television. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 7ap0y
Television is a source of knowledge and entertainment 24*7 throughout the world. Everyday lots of news, entertainment, sports, educational and other channels provide information from one end of earth to another. In my opinion parents should allow their kids to watch television. So that they will be updated about all the information about new technologies, methods, study materials etc. First reason for parents to allow their children to watch television is that as kids grow up they have to face the competitive world and play hard to survive and prove their existence. Because of television they will get all the information through news and educational channels to know the things happening around the world. For example, if kids are allowed to watch television they will learn about their geography, history and related events etc which are mostly asked question during a general knowledge competition. Another reason for parents to allow their kids to watch television is when kids come back home from their school, coaching or sports they need to relax their mind. For that they can watch their favorite entertainment show on television to get relief from daily chores. For instance when kids come back from school and still engaged in stress of studies they should be allowed to watch their favorite show so that they can refresh their mood and go back to study. Additionally, television is also a source to educate kids about any thing they want to learn. Sometime it's difficult to understand what is written in the books but by watching it in the form of short film or graphic illustration makes things easy to understand and learn passively. Like in case when I was learning about gene mutation, it was not easy for me to understand it through books, but when I saw a video on discovery channel it became an permanent memory for me and I can't forget about the whole process after watching that video. In conclusion, watching television may be not a preference for every parent for their kids. But by knowing the advantages like gaining knowledge, entertainment purpose and a passive method to learn difficult things written in the books, I think parents should allow their kids to watch television. Because everything has its dark side.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Television
is a source of knowledge and entertainment
Replace by the typographical symbol.
24*7
throughout the world. Everyday lots of news, entertainment, sports, educational and other channels provide information from one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of earth to another. In my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that they will
be updated
about all the information about new technologies, methods, study materials etc.

First
reason for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
their children to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is that as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
grow up they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
face the competitive world and play
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to survive and prove their existence.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all the information through news and educational channels to know the things happening around the world.
For example
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about their geography, history and related
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
etc which are
mostly
asked question during a general knowledge competition.

Another reason for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
back home from their school, coaching or sports they need to relax their mind. For that they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
their favorite entertainment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
relief from daily chores.
For instance
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
back from school and
still
engaged in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of studies they should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
their favorite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can refresh their mood and go back to study.

Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is
also
a source to educate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
about
Did you mean "anything"?
any thing
they want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
. Sometime it's difficult to understand what
is written
in the books
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by watching it in the form of short film or graphic illustration
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
things easy to understand and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
passively
. Like in case when I was learning about gene mutation, it was not easy for me to understand it through books,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a video on discovery channel it became
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
permanent memory for me and I can't forget about the whole process after watching that video.

In conclusion
, watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
may be not a preference for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
by knowing the advantages like gaining knowledge, entertainment purpose and a passive method to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
difficult things written in the books, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
everything has its dark side.
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IELTS essay Parents should not allow their children to watch television. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
376 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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