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Oxygen is getting frail day by day. It is difficult to breathe the contaminated air why do you think such as serious problem

Oxygen is getting frail day by day. It is difficult to breathe the contaminated air why do you think such as serious problem 7Jka6
Oxygen is the most important source to live on the earth. Nowadays, oxygen is getting frail and it is difficult to breathe the bad quality of air. There are various serious reason and I will give some reasons and suggestions in the upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, first and the foremost reason is risen population. People get things from the nature such as fruits, vegetables, woods et cetera, these all things are needed to human beings for survival and human gets all these from forests and trees. Moreover, fumes by vehicles in daily life and vehicles burn fuels and generate fumes, this mix with air and quality of oxygen decreases. Furthermore, emitting smoke by chimneys of chemical industries is the major problem which frail the oxygen chemical industries remove smoke which mix-up with air and as a result, quality of air is decreasing day by day. So, these are some reasons which is creating difficulty in breathing. Moving further, on to the earth nature is the source of oxygen that is trees or forest. People should plant trees on their special day like birthdays and on ceremonies, this is really helpful to maintain the atmosphere. In addition to this, afforestation kills increase the quality of air but this is steady process and time consuming. Moreover, government should encourage of green fuel vehicles as well as make some law regarding cutting of trees. To illustrate, in Delhi capital of India, diesel vehicles are divide on their commercial and personal numbers like odd or even and some vehicles run only on odd days and some with even number run the next day. In conclusion, oxygen is a natural source and People need to breathe and stay alive. So, there are various reasons of this issue, it can be tackled by the joint efforts of government and people.
Oxygen is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
source to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on the earth. Nowadays, oxygen is getting frail and it is difficult to breathe the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
. There are various serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
and I will give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
and suggestions in the upcoming paragraphs. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
first
and the foremost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is risen
population.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
things from the nature such as fruits, vegetables,
Possible spelling mistake found.
woods et
cetera, these all things
are needed
to human beings for survival and human
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
all these from forests and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
.
Moreover
, fumes by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
in daily life and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
burn fuels and generate fumes, this mix with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of oxygen decreases.
Furthermore
, emitting smoke by chimneys of chemical industries is the major problem which frail the oxygen chemical industries remove smoke which mix-up with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
and
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
is decreasing day by day.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, these are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
which is creating difficulty in breathing. Moving
further
, on to the earth nature is the source of oxygen
that is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
or forest.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
should plant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
on their special day like birthdays and on ceremonies, this is
really
helpful to maintain the atmosphere.
In addition
to this, afforestation kills increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this is steady process and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should encourage of green fuel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
law regarding cutting of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
. To illustrate, in Delhi capital of India, diesel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
are divide on their commercial and personal numbers like odd or even and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
run
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on odd days and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
with even number run the
next
day.
In conclusion
, oxygen is a natural source and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
need to breathe and stay alive.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, there are various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
of this issue, it can
be tackled
by the joint efforts of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
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IELTS essay Oxygen is getting frail day by day. It is difficult to breathe the contaminated air why do you think such as serious problem

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
305 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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