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Overpopulation in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem. What are the causes of this? How can this problem be solved?

Overpopulation in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem. What are the causes of this? How can this problem be solved? 8lXm
Overpopulation has become increasingly popular topic in urban cities. This essay will discuss the two main causes of increasing inhabitants in inner cities including lack of proper education facilities and employment opportunities in rural villages. This essay will also suggest solutions to these problems including establishing universities and industries in villages. To begin with, No. of people are migrating to down town in search of proper education. There are abundance school and colleges in village; however, there are extremely few universities which provide better coaching. Thus, it force aspiring students to migrate to cities in order to pursue higher study and get strong certificate of their course, which helps them find job easily in the future. In addition, They also come here for job prospects. For instance, According to the recent survey conducted by Nepal government that almost 85% people are migrating to capital Kathmandu in purpose of finding jobs as they did not get employment on the basis of their interest and course. Moreover, They did not get sufficient wages from their work in their village. Thus, in order to enhance their knowledge and to settle in life, people are moving towards cities from village. Besides every problem, there is always one or two solutions. Building coaching institutions and industries should be done to mitigate aforementioned causes. Government should encourage businessman to set-up their business in rural areas. This would help to foster employment facilities and evolve job opportunities in the rural places. Furthermore, it also helps to reduced population in cities. To illustrate, Bagmati province government in Nepal has taken several measures to establish universities and industries in the district of Nuwakot and this has drastically reduced the population in cities such as Kathmandu and Bhaktapur. Thus, cities population will ultimately declined if their started distributing proper job facilities and education in villages. In conclusion, Significant no. of people migrating towards cities are creating numerous threat for urban people. Should reducing population in cities be totally necessary nowadays? This essay discussed lack of schooling institution and industries in villages are major causes of overpopulation in cities. This essay also suggested that the solutions to this problems are twofold: building coaching institution and industries in rural areas.
Overpopulation has become
increasingly
popular topic in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will discuss the two main causes of increasing inhabitants in inner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
including lack of proper education facilities and employment opportunities in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will
also
suggest solutions to these problems including establishing universities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
in villages.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, No. of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are migrating to down town in search of proper education. There are abundance school and colleges in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
;
however
, there are
extremely
few universities which provide better coaching.
Thus
,
It seems that the possessive pronoun "its" fits better in this context. Please verify.
it
force aspiring students to migrate to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
in order to pursue higher study and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
strong certificate of their course, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
easily
in the future.
In addition
, They
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
here for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
prospects.
For instance
, According to the recent survey conducted by Nepal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
that almost 85%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are migrating to capital Kathmandu in purpose of finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
as they did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
employment on the basis of their interest and course.
Moreover
, They did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sufficient wages from their work in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
.
Thus
, in order to enhance their knowledge and to settle in life,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are moving towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
from village.

Besides
every problem, there is always one or two solutions. Building coaching institutions and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
should
be done
to mitigate aforementioned causes.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should encourage businessman
The verb 'set up' is spelled as two words. The noun 'setup' is spelled as one.
to set-up
their business in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
areas. This would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to foster employment facilities and evolve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
places.
Furthermore
, it
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. To illustrate,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bagmati
province
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in Nepal has taken several measures to establish universities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
in the district of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nuwakot
and this has
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
such as Kathmandu and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bhaktapur
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
will
ultimately
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "decline"
declined
if their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
distributing proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
facilities and education in villages.

In conclusion
, Significant no. of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
migrating towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are creating numerous threat for urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Should
The verb 'Should' requires the base form of the verb: "reduce"
reducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
be
totally
necessary nowadays? This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
discussed lack of schooling institution and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
are major causes of overpopulation in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
also
suggested that the solutions to
Did you mean "these"?
this
problems are twofold: building coaching institution and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
areas.
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IELTS essay Overpopulation in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem. What are the causes of this? How can this problem be solved?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
368 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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