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Overpopulation in many major urban center is a major problem

Overpopulation in many major urban center is a major problem mLMDA
Nowadays, numerous city centers around the world are facing with the issue of overpopulation. The major factors of this challenge are lack of good living conditions and career opportunities in towns and countryside. A number of solutions can be represented to tackle this issue. Firstly, the main reason for the increasing number of humans in urban cities is the lack of job opportunities in rural areas. People ought to migrate in order to have good and well-paid jobs. There, in the urban cities individuals have numerous options concerning salary and opportunities. In addition, people who earn good amount of money have the chance to provide better lifestyle to their families. Secondly, urban cities provide its residents with a higher quality of living and access to basic needs of life. Specifically, people in bigger cities have access to a wide variety of lucrative jobs, which leads to the improvement of the standard of life. Unfortunately, the increasing population in major cities around the world has created a number of problems, which need to be tackled. To reduce the number of migration from countryside to major center, better opportunities and facilities should be created. By establishing more companies and modern hospitals, and solving the educational issues in rural areas, can improve life of individuals and helping workers to increase their work productivity will increase their income. Fortunately, it will help them to maintain their families and enjoy their lives. In conclusion, to tackle this problem government should not concern about only centers, on the contrary also focus more on the development of the rural areas.
Nowadays, numerous city centers around the world are facing with the issue of overpopulation. The major factors of this challenge are lack of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
living conditions and career
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
in towns and countryside. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of solutions can
be represented
to tackle this issue.

Firstly
, the main reason for the increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of humans in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is the lack of job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
in rural areas.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
ought to migrate in order to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and well-paid jobs. There, in the urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
individuals have numerous options concerning salary and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who earn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
amount of money have the chance to provide better lifestyle to their families.
Secondly
, urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
provide its residents with a higher quality of living and access to basic needs of life.
Specifically
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in bigger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
have access to a wide variety of lucrative jobs, which leads to the improvement of the standard of life.

Unfortunately, the increasing population in major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
around the world has created a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of problems, which need to
be tackled
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of migration from countryside to major center, better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
and facilities should
be created
. By establishing more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and modern hospitals, and solving the educational issues in rural areas, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
life of individuals and helping workers to increase their work productivity will increase their income.
Fortunately
, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to maintain their families and enjoy their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

In conclusion
, to tackle this problem
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should not concern about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
centers,
on the contrary
also
focus more on the development of the rural areas.
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IELTS essay Overpopulation in many major urban center is a major problem

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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