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Overfishing of the world's ocean threatens many species with extinction and is putting the livelihood of many millions of people around the world at risk. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to prevent it from happening?

Overfishing of the world's ocean threatens many species with extinction and is putting the livelihood of many millions of people around the world at risk. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to prevent it from happening? w1kr
Excessive fishing has been a disputable topic since its a prime reason for the extermination of marine species due to which many livelihood of people are at risk of falling into extreme poverty. These activities are caused by various factors and it should be tackled by local government in the nearby residents. There have been a lot of reason for overfishing. People from different area rely on fishing as it is their source of income. Sometimes these people involve in immoderate fishing to earn more than average. Even though government makes certain rules and regulations, in some areas fishing remains uncontrolled due to on unconfined policy. These Piscator sometimes take fish from the marine resources at a rate faster than they can reproduce. Due to this, many sea food around the world is expected to be depleted in the next two decade. Overfishing certainly has a huge impact on humans and the fishing industry. As fishing has been the source of income for many people, they will lose their job if fishing is not controlled. To prevent overfishing there must be certain limits for catching fish so that many endangered species of marine habitats will not be at threat. Many people practice illegal fishing; these activities must be banned and those who commit should be fined high penalty. Government should increase tax for huge fishing companies so that they will reduce fishing. In conclusion, overfishing is the biggest concern all over the globe. Government and we individuals must play a vital role to reduce these problems by creating awareness programs and respecting fishing policies.
Excessive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
has been a disputable topic since
Did you mean "it's" (="it is") instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
its
a prime reason for the extermination of marine species due to which
Possible agreement error. The noun livelihood seems to be countable; consider using: "many livelihoods".
many livelihood
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of falling into extreme poverty. These activities
are caused
by various factors and it should
be tackled
by local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
in the nearby residents.

There have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
reason for overfishing.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
area rely on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
as it is their source of income.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
involve in immoderate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
to earn more than average.
Even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
remains uncontrolled due to on unconfined policy.
Did you mean "this Piscator" or "These piscators"?
These Piscator
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
take fish from the marine resources at a rate faster than they can reproduce. Due to this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
sea food around the world is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to
be depleted
in the
next
two decade.

Overfishing
certainly
has a huge impact on humans and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
industry. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
has been the source of income for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, they will lose their job if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
is not controlled. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
overfishing there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be certain limits for catching fish
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
endangered species of marine habitats will not be at threat.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
practice illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
; these activities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be banned
and those who commit should
be fined
high penalty.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should increase tax for huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
fishing.

In conclusion
, overfishing is the biggest concern all over the globe.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
and we individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
play a vital role to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
these problems by creating awareness programs and respecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
policies.
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IELTS essay Overfishing of the world's ocean threatens many species with extinction and is putting the livelihood of many millions of people around the world at risk. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to prevent it from happening?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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