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Over a decade, museums have been becoming

Over a decade, museums have been becoming BYm0w
Over a decade, museums have been becoming one of the landmarks to visit, while travelling abroad or sightseeing proposed. Although some people agree that museums were built only for education, I personally think that these places should enhance every kind of sense, included entertainment purpose. In the following paragraph, both sides will be discussed. For some places with a long story of history, where people believe that several products is a container of spirits and some might involve superstition, which everyone should respect by the only study from those with good manners and be respectful. For instance, in Thailand, many museums are located in temples, where being polite and quiet are required, most of the products showing are involved with religions and traditional beliefs. In fact, people go there for particular purposes, mostly for education. Moving to the second thought, museums in modern countries, such as the UK and Australia, like The national museum in Melbourne, There are many rooms to performs the pieces of art in different ways of presentation, depending on the regions, which is significantly more interesting than regular museums by the fact that they create the feeling by using technologies such as Virtual tours and surrounded audio, which enhance the experience and encourage people to remember and willing to learn about the histories. To summarize, both kinds of museums were constructed for various specific purposes. However, I personally prefer the modern museums since it is more interactive and interesting to spend a day exploring inside.
Over a decade,
museums
have been becoming one of the landmarks to visit, while travelling abroad or sightseeing proposed. Although
some
people
agree
that
museums
were built
only
for education, I
personally
think
that these places should enhance every kind of sense, included entertainment purpose. In the following paragraph, both sides will
be discussed
.

For
some
places with a long story of history, where
people
believe that several products is a container of spirits and
some
might involve superstition, which everyone should respect by the
only
study from those with
good
manners and be respectful.
For instance
, in Thailand,
many
museums
are located
in temples, where being polite and quiet
are required
, most of the products showing
are involved
with religions and traditional beliefs. In fact,
people
go there for particular purposes,
mostly
for education.

Moving to the second
thought
,
museums
in modern countries, such as the UK and Australia, like The national
museum
in Melbourne, There are
many
rooms to performs the pieces of art in
different
ways of presentation, depending on the regions, which is
significantly
more interesting than regular
museums
by the fact that they create the feeling by using technologies such as Virtual tours and surrounded audio, which enhance the experience and encourage
people
to remember and willing to learn about the histories.

To summarize
, both kinds of
museums
were constructed
for various specific purposes.
However
, I
personally
prefer the modern
museums
since it is more interactive and interesting to spend a day exploring inside.
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IELTS essay Over a decade, museums have been becoming

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
249 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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