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On the one hand, it is understandable why a number of people do not want to spend too much money on festivals. The first reason is that the organization of festivals can pollute the environment. Nowadays, there are numerous festivals that attract a huge number of participants which results in a huge amount of rubbish being discharged away once the event is over. Consequently, as there are more festivals, the pollution will become more s it is very neccessary

On the one hand, it is understandable why a number of people do not want to spend too much money on festivals. The first reason is that the organization of festivals can pollute the environment. Nowadays, there are numerous festivals that attract a huge number of participants which results in a huge amount of rubbish being discharged away once the event is over. Consequently, as there are more festivals, the pollution will become more s it is very neccessary XVnoA
On the one hand, it is understandable why a number of people do not want to spend too much money on festivals. The first reason is that the organization of festivals can pollute the environment. Nowadays, there are numerous festivals that attract a huge number of participants which results in a huge amount of rubbish being discharged away once the event is over. Consequently, as there are more festivals, the pollution will become more severe. Another justification is that organizing festivals can be a waste of money. For instance, on big holidays like Tet, people spend a great deal of time and money decorating their house like buying peach trees or kumquats. However, when the festival ended, those items would be thrown away after only a week or two, which was incredibly costly.
On the one hand, it is understandable why a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not want to spend too much money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
. The
first
reason is that the organization of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
can pollute the environment. Nowadays, there are numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
that attract a huge number of participants which results in a huge amount of rubbish
being discharged
away once the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
is over.
Consequently
, as there are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
, the pollution will become more severe. Another justification is that organizing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
can be a waste of money.
For instance
, on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
holidays like Tet,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
spend a great deal of time and money decorating their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
like buying peach trees or kumquats.
However
, when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
ended, those items would
be thrown
away after
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a week or two, which was
incredibly
costly.
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IELTS essay On the one hand, it is understandable why a number of people do not want to spend too much money on festivals. The first reason is that the organization of festivals can pollute the environment. Nowadays, there are numerous festivals that attract a huge number of participants which results in a huge amount of rubbish being discharged away once the event is over. Consequently, as there are more festivals, the pollution will become more s it is very neccessary

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
133 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • On the one hand, it is understandable why a number of people do not want to spend too much money on festivals. The first reason is that the organization of festivals can pollute the environment. Nowadays, there are numerous festivals that attract a huge number of participants which results in a huge amount of rubbish being discharged away once the event is over. Consequently, as there are more festivals, the pollution will become more s it is very neccessary