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oing to university for higher education after high school is becoming increasingly popular.

oing to university for higher education after high school is becoming increasingly popular. Most students prefer to study university after they finish the high school instead of working. This essay will discuss both sides of this event. On the one hand, there are a number of advantages of to study university before the working. Firstly, recent studies conducted by University has shown that students who register for university courses after school has higher chances of good academic scores. Secondly, joining a course and finishing it with good grades open doors to opportunities. So, students get good salary jobs in their respective domain at early stage of life compare to others and lead a direct path to success. Finally, applying immediately for university courses, after school, keep students focused and more study oriented than those who start working after school and then resume their studies later. So, they can learn many things in this period. On the other hand, This ongoing trend also has some disadvantages. Firstly, people will not have local working experience which is very important to understand the job market. If you know how things are being managed in the market, you will get one step closer to the success. When students study at universities they don’t know about these things. Secondly, work experience gives a new point of view to see the world. One can truly understand their interests which helps to decide the field of study. For example, if they will work in sales team first before actually pursuing degree in sales, they will have a better idea that are they content with sales job or not. Hence, working before choosing the field of study has its own benefits. Finally, they learn many useful things from their colleagues during the working. In conclusion, students should consider both sides and choose widely.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
oing
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
for higher education after high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is becoming
increasingly
popular. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
after they finish the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
. This essay will discuss both sides of this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
.

On the one hand, there are a number of advantages of to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
.
Firstly
, recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
conducted by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
has shown that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who register for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
courses after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
has higher chances of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
academic scores.
Secondly
, joining a course and finishing it with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
grades open doors to opportunities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary jobs in their respective domain at early stage of life compare to others and lead a direct path to success.
Finally
, applying immediately for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
courses, after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
focused and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
oriented than those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and then resume their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
later.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they can learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things in this period.

On the other hand
, This ongoing trend
also
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will not have local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
experience which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to understand the job market. If you know how things are
being managed
in the market, you will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
one step closer to the success.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
they don’t know about these things.
Secondly
, work experience gives a new point of view to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the world. One can
truly
understand their interests which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to decide the field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
For example
, if they will work in sales team
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
actually pursuing degree in sales, they will have a better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that are they content with sales job or not.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
choosing the field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits.
Finally
, they learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
useful things from their colleagues during the working.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should consider both sides and choose
widely
.
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IELTS essay oing to university for higher education after high school is becoming increasingly popular.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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