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obesity is an increasing public health problem

obesity is an increasing public health problem rb29m
Nowadays, people across the world are suffering from the problems of obesity. In this essay, I will analyse the tow main reasons of this problem and also enlighten two measures that can effectively solve this issue. The main reason of this problem is sedentary lifestyle, due to which people do not have any fix routine. Infact, people spend most of their time sitting in their office which makes them physically inactive and lazy. Moreover, people of today's era like eating fast food because they think it is convenient, easily available and delicious. Therefore, people intake a lot of carbohydrates and fats in their meal, which in turn is the main cause of overweight. In addition, people do not like to waste time in cooking and they want to utilize this time in completing office work. Hence, this habit further leads to lack of movement in persons life. Turning to possible solutions, people can try to follow a fixed schedule which must include ample amount of time for exercise. Additionally, people can take a short walk around the ground in between of their work, which will help them to burn their fat and decreases their weight. Furthermore, people can indulge themselves in cooking so that they can limit the amount of fat in their diet and include various proteins and vitamins in their food. As a result, people will start eating nutritious meal which in urn is helpful in controlling the weight and makes humans energetic. In conclusion, the main reasons of obesity are busy lifestyle and eating junk food. However, solutions are following a fix routine which includes physical movements and eating daily healthy food.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
across the world are suffering from the problems of obesity. In this essay, I will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
the tow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
reasons of this problem and
also
enlighten two measures that can
effectively
solve this issue.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
reason of this problem is sedentary lifestyle, due to which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
routine.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Infact
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend most of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
sitting in their office which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them
physically
inactive and lazy.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's era like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is convenient,
easily
available and delicious.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
intake
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
carbohydrates and fats in their meal, which in turn is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
cause of overweight.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not like to waste
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
cooking and
they want to utilize this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in completing office work.
Hence
, this habit
further
leads to lack of movement in persons life.

Turning to possible solutions,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can try to follow a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
schedule which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
include ample amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for exercise.
Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can take a short walk around the ground in between of their work, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to burn their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
and decreases their weight.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can indulge themselves in cooking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can limit the amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
in their diet and include various proteins and vitamins in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
nutritious meal which in urn is helpful in controlling the weight and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
humans energetic.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
main
reasons of obesity are busy lifestyle and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
However
, solutions are following a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
routine which includes physical movements and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
daily healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
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IELTS essay obesity is an increasing public health problem

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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