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Nowadays, the internet has a vital role in our personal as well as social lives. Some people say that this escalation is a chance for to people stick together,

Nowadays, the internet has a vital role in our personal as well as social lives. Some people say that this escalation is a chance for to people stick together, YgJVn
Nowadays, the internet has a vital role in our personal as well as social lives. Some people say that this escalation is a chance for to people stick together, while others argue that this growth in internet usage leads to scattering people and being isolated. In this essay, I will look at both sides of the argument and give my opinion with relevant examples. Firstly, the majority of people are spending their time on the internet even though the time is limited. The positive and unavoidable benefit of this growth on social media is not only in terms of technology but also developing social attention between people are not closer. For instance, considering some people migrated to a foreign nation for their education as well as employment. They could not have any chance to communicate with their parents in their home city. With the development of social media, the populace out of the nation or any place can simply keep in touch with people who love them. On the other hand, in today's world, some people believe that the improvement of the internet is leading to people being apart and community as well. For example, the masses who spend their time on social media have not get any chance to mingle with their parents as well as with friends. Secondly and most importantly, they have abundance time to complete or concentrate on jobs or education. It is my belief that the internet is crucial in our lives. Moreover, overtime spending on it will never gives a happy life although, it has some positive role in our daily life. The population who is spending lots of time on the internet will never get a chance to be with people who love them. By way of conclusion, the Internet is one of the fundamental thing in today. Considering the above arguments, the large population stand on, the internet usage leads to attaching people together whist others think it scattering people. In my opinion, spending too much time on the internet will separate people by finding their own happiness in it.
Nowadays, the internet has a vital role in our personal as
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well
as
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social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
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Some
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people
say that this escalation is a chance for to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
stick together, while others argue that this growth in internet usage leads to scattering
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people
and
being isolated
. In this essay, I will look at both sides of the argument and give my opinion with relevant examples.

Firstly
, the majority of
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people
are
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spending
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on the internet
even though
the
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time
is limited
. The
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positive
and unavoidable benefit of this growth on
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social
media is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in terms of technology
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
developing
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social
attention between
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people
are not closer.
For instance
, considering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
migrated to a foreign nation for their education as
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well
as employment. They could not have any chance to communicate with their parents in their home city. With the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media, the populace out of the nation or any place can
simply
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
them.

On the other hand
, in
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today
's world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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people
believe that the improvement of the internet is leading to
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people
being apart and community as
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well
.
For example
, the masses
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who
spend their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
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social
media have not
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "got", "gotten".
get
any chance to mingle with their parents as
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well
as with friends.

Secondly
and most
importantly
, they have abundance
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time
to complete or concentrate on jobs or education.

It is my belief that the internet is crucial in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Moreover
, overtime
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spending
on it will never gives a happy life although, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
role in our daily life. The population
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who
is
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spending
lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on the internet will never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance to be with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
them.

By way of conclusion, the Internet is one of the fundamental thing in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. Considering the above arguments, the large population stand on, the internet usage leads to attaching
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people
together whist others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it scattering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on the internet will separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by finding their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
happiness in it.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, the internet has a vital role in our personal as well as social lives. Some people say that this escalation is a chance for to people stick together,

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
348 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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