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Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cellphone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

In the recent days, due to the intense technical developments, many people are being victims of being recorded for the activities such as the places they visit, the time spent there or even what they did there without their consciousness. Tracking of personal data is mostly done by using cellphone tracking or the security cameras. Technical growth has multiple advantages which are benefiting many people worldwide however, there are equal number disadvantages. Developmental work in the field of technology has had a rapid growth in the last few decades which are essential for the daily activities now. Firstly, communication has been simpler when compared to the olden days where, writing letters were the most popular means of communication, which was slow and inefficient (mostly never reached the destination). Access to a huge number of information and statistics is now easier and can be obtained at our finger tips. Technology has found a place for itself in every aspects of our life. Many disadvantages can be listed for this topic, one among them which is on the spot light is the illegal monitoring and use of personal data. For instance, according to an online survey, parents and child hardly get a chance to meet each other on a daily basis rather choose to video call or send messages. The particular reason for this situation is due to the improvements in technology. With all that in mind, with the increasing number of benefits, there comes the risk of having to face problems. Technology was supposed to be a bridge between people however, over use of technology has created a barrier between us. It is in our hands to see the sunny side of the technical growth and use them wisely.
In the recent days, due to the intense technical developments,
many
people
are being victims of
being recorded
for the activities such as the places they visit, the time spent there or even what they did there without their consciousness. Tracking of personal data is
mostly
done by using cellphone tracking or the security cameras. Technical growth has multiple advantages which are benefiting
many
people
worldwide
however
, there are equal number disadvantages.

Developmental work in the field of
technology
has had a rapid growth in the last few decades which are essential for the daily activities
now
.
Firstly
, communication has been simpler when compared to the olden
days where
, writing letters were the most popular means of communication, which was slow and inefficient (
mostly
never reached the destination). Access to a huge number of information and statistics is
now
easier and can
be obtained
at our finger tips.
Technology
has found a place for itself in every
aspects
of our life.

Many
disadvantages can
be listed
for this topic, one among them which is on the spot light is the illegal monitoring and
use
of personal data.
For instance
, according to an online survey, parents and child hardly
get
a chance to
meet
each other on a daily basis
rather
choose to video call or
send
messages. The particular reason for this situation is due to the improvements in technology.

With all that in mind, with the increasing number of benefits, there
comes
the
risk
of having to face problems.
Technology
was supposed
to be a bridge between
people
however
, over
use
of
technology
has created a barrier between us. It is in our hands to
see
the sunny side of the technical growth and
use
them
wisely
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cellphone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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