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nowadays some people move to another country for working. Some people think that it may have neggative impacts while others disagree

nowadays some people move to another country for working. Some people think that it may have neggative impacts while others disagree kWqNW
Migration for work is a popular trend. These days, there is a growing trend of families moving to various foreign countries in search of work. Most people think that it has negative impacts on children, while others feel moving abroad brings more benefits especially for their children exploring foreign education and culture. This essay will look at some negative sites of this and benefits for children. On the one hand, families moving to other country can encounter some problems. First, learning a new language could be a biggest barrier to them, they may not cope with academic or linguistic abilities of their new friends. This may cause to children’s morale and make them be stressed or disappointed. For instance, they don’t understand what their teacher talking about and cannot ask their classmates to explain. Second, kids could take a long time to integrate into a new environment and culture, since they have to leave their close friends contributing to their loneliness. Adapting to a new culture can take a long time, and low their motivation to communicate with their circle. For example, local people misunderstood them if they do something that not coincide to their culture and it will be strange for them. On the other hand, working overseas and taking all their children to live could bring some benefits to them. It helps parents giving more opportunities to work and to raise their children better. Therefore, their children will have a better living condition to develop. For example, children can go various types of sport or music lessons which are paid. In addition, going to another country assist their kids to have a better education system. For example, some Vietnamese people move to many developed countries, because the school curriculum will help their children to enhance their knowledge and skills completely. In conclusion, while people may vary in their opinion, I think that living abroad with parents would bring many advantages to the children.
Migration for work is a popular trend. These days, there is a growing trend of families moving to various foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in search of work. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, while others feel moving abroad brings more benefits
especially
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
exploring foreign education and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. This essay will look at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
sites of this and benefits for children.

On the one hand, families moving to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can encounter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems.
First
, learning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
language could be
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
biggest barrier to them, they may not cope with academic or linguistic abilities of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friends. This may cause to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
morale and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
or disappointed.
For instance
, they don’t understand what their teacher talking about and cannot ask their classmates to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
. Second, kids could take a long time to integrate into a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
environment and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, since they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their close friends contributing to their loneliness. Adapting to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
can take a long time, and low their motivation to communicate with their circle.
For example
, local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
misunderstood them if they do something that not coincide to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and it will be strange for them.

On the other hand
, working overseas and taking all their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
could bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits to them. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
parents giving more opportunities to work and to raise their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
better.
Therefore
, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will have a better living condition to develop.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can go various types of sport or music lessons which
are paid
.
In addition
, going to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
assist their kids to have a better education system.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Vietnamese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the school curriculum will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to enhance their knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
completely.

In conclusion
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may vary in their opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that living abroad with parents would bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
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IELTS essay nowadays some people move to another country for working. Some people think that it may have neggative impacts while others disagree

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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