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Nowadays, people are consuming more and more sugar based drinks.Why do they do so? suggest measure to solve the problem.

In the contemporary era, sugar based drinks reach at the peak of solding out and these drinks are in the pace of proliferating. This essay intends to analyse the cause of these problems and some measure to prevent these problems in subsequent paragraphs. First of all, I have several reasons for why people are drinking more sugar based drinks? They all knew that it’s unhealthy for their own health but significantly, they prefer drinking these types of drinks who consist lot of sugar. Firstly, These types of drinks have a splendid taste and it refresh our mouth as well as our mood. One specialty about this drink is that these kind of drinks have exquisite aroma in itself. The plethora of sugar in a drink is very catchy thing like people who tried first time now they are addicted to it. At present, any of us who don’t like to taste bitter. Everyone like a good taste. To exemplify, like me I never like sugar but when i tried sugar based drinks to be honest, I am very addicted to it. It feels like that hypotize me. Still, I don’t like sugar but i do like sugar based drinks. On the other hand, I have some reasons to alleviate these kind of cause of sugar drinks. Fristly, A company who is manufacturing these drinks must start adding less sugar. Every companies should take decision on it. Secondly, all people know that lots of sugar cause lots of diseases and have a distinguished impact in our body. Several diseases like high blood pressure, increase in fat, etcetera. We should avoid these drinks so, we can desert these diseases. Apart from this, all people should have only consisted of less sugar. Try to rid these problems slowly and steadily. To bring the curtain down, people who are addicted to this high sugar drink. They should overcome addiction. Earlier mentioned diseases will cause to the adolescent as well as adults and certainly old people. From today, people should make a resolution of not having a plethora of sugar-based drinks.
In the contemporary era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
reach at the peak of
Possible spelling mistake found.
solding
out and these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
are in the pace of proliferating. This essay intends to
Possible spelling mistake. ‘analyse’ is British English.
analyse
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
of these problems and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measure to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
these problems in subsequent paragraphs.

Often, this adverbial phrase is redundant. Consider using “first”.
First of all
, I have several reasons for why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are drinking more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
? They all knew that it’s unhealthy for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
significantly
, they prefer drinking these types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
consist
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
.
Firstly
, These types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
have a splendid
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
taste and
it
After ‘it’, use the third-person verb form “refreshes”.
refresh
our mouth
as well
as our mood. One specialty about this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
is that
‘These’ does not seem to match the singular noun ‘kind’. Did you mean “this kind” or “these kinds”?
these kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
have exquisite aroma in itself. The plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
catchy thing like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
tried
first
time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
they
are addicted
to it. At present, any of us
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
don’t like to taste bitter. Everyone like a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
taste. To exemplify, like
Consider adding a comma here.
me
I never like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when
Is this the personal pronoun “I”? It is spelled uppercase.
i
tried
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
to be honest, I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
addicted to it. It feels like that
Possible spelling mistake found.
hypotize
me.
Still
, I don’t like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Is this the personal pronoun “I”? It is spelled uppercase.
i
do like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
.
On the other hand
, I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons to alleviate
‘These’ does not seem to match the singular noun ‘kind’. Did you mean “this kind” or “these kinds”?
these kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Fristly
, A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
is manufacturing these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
adding less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
. Every
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “company”?
companies
should take decision on it.
Secondly
, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know that lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
and have a distinguished impact in our body. Several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
like high blood pressure, increase in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
, etcetera. We should avoid these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, we can desert these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
. Apart from this, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
consisted of less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
. Try to rid these problems
slowly
and
steadily
.

To bring the curtain down,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are addicted
to this high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
. They should overcome addiction. Earlier mentioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
to the adolescent
as well
as adults and
certainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. From
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a resolution of not having a plethora of sugar-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, people are consuming more and more sugar based drinks. Why do they do so? suggest measure to solve the problem.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
346 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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