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Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development? PqYp
Many parents insist that their children should become successful in their schools, putting them under a lot of pressure. The main reason behind this is that they want them to go to prestigious universities and faculties, and this should be considered as a negative development because this may negatively affect their academic performance. This essay will discuss the factors contributing to this pressure, followed by a discussion on the negative consequences. Many families want their children to be at the top of their classes. This is because they want their children to enrol in colleges and faculties which would provide them with a better future, securing their livelihoods and providing them with better career prospects. For example, many middle-eastern families insist that their daughters and sons become doctors and engineers. As a consequence, they force their children to study for long hours and punish them if they do not get the score that they expect from them. Placing children under so much stress may have an opposite harmful effect on them. Pushing students to their limits would lead to them underperforming academically, and they would feel that they are way behind their peers. Therefore, they will become be demotivated and discouraged, and they are more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety. As a result, they would suffer from low-self esteem, as they have failed to meet their parents’ expectations. For instance, many students report suffering from stress-related disorders due to the constant stressful conditions that they live in, from the demands of their parents to the struggle to keep up with all the studying. In conclusion, parents who constantly put their youngsters under great tension to score top grades to become achieving and join well-known universities may do more harm than good to them. This is because their offsprings may feel that they are not smart enough, and this also may lower their confidence.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
insist that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
successful in their schools, putting them under
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
pressure. The main reason behind this is that they want them to go to prestigious universities and faculties, and this should
be considered
as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this may
negatively
affect their academic performance. This essay will discuss the factors contributing to this pressure, followed by a discussion on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
families want their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be at the top of their classes. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to enrol in colleges and faculties which would provide them with a better future, securing their livelihoods and providing them with better career prospects.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
middle-eastern families insist that their daughters and sons
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
doctors and engineers. As a consequence, they force their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to study for long hours and punish them if they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the score that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
from them.

Placing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
under
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
may have an opposite harmful effect on them. Pushing students to their limits would lead to them underperforming
academically
, and they would feel that they are way behind their peers.
Therefore
, they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
be demotivated
and discouraged, and they are more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety.
As a result
, they would suffer from low-self esteem, as they have failed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents’
expectations.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students report suffering from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-related disorders due to the constant stressful conditions that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in, from the demands of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to the struggle to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with all the studying.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
who
constantly
put their youngsters under great tension to score top grades to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
achieving and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
well-known universities may do more harm than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to them. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
may feel that they are not smart
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, and this
also
may lower their confidence.
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IELTS essay Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
315 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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