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Nowadays parents give more freedom to their children than in the past.Is it a positive or negative development?

In recent days, parents are giving more liberty to their offspring as compared to the past. In my opinion, l believe this is a good thing as it helps to build self confidence and independence in their lives. Granting more freedom boosts self confidence of each child. Most of the young ones depends on their parents when they are in childhood days. If parents are providing more freedom on these days will help the children to explore new things from outside and start to believe in themselves. Consequently, the level of confidence will gradually increase and helps to become more confident person. Furthermore, gaining more liberty from the caretakers help them to become self-dependent person. So, child start to do and think in free way and without the help from others, they make good decisions in the life. Therefore, each and every child can enjoy independent skills. A recent study conducted by university of Kerala states that parents are allowing the kids to choose the right path of their career from young age itself can make to attain self-dependent nature in them can also be cited as an example. To conclude, while comparing with the past days, parents of this time are providing more freedom to their offspring as it act as a way to develop confidence as well as dependent skills
In recent days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are giving more liberty to their offspring as compared to the past. In my opinion, l believe this is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
thing as it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to build self
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
confidence
and independence in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Granting more freedom boosts self
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
confidence
of each child. Most of the young ones depends on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
when they are in childhood days. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are providing more freedom on these days will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the children to explore new things from outside and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to believe in themselves.
Consequently
, the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
confidence
will
gradually
increase and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to become more confident person.
Furthermore
, gaining more liberty from the caretakers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to become self-dependent person.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to do and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
in free way and without the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
from others, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
decisions in the life.
Therefore
, each and every child can enjoy independent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. A recent study conducted by university of Kerala states that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are allowing the kids to choose the right path of their career from young age itself can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
to attain self-dependent nature in them can
also
be cited
as an example.
To conclude
, while comparing with the past days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
of this time are providing more freedom to their offspring as it act as a way to develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
confidence
as well
as dependent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
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IELTS essay Nowadays parents give more freedom to their children than in the past. Is it a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
221 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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