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Nowadays most people do not care about the evironmental issues. What extend do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer

Nowadays most people do not care about the evironmental issues. What extend Give reasons for your answer ApDJN
Environmental problems are indeed growing concerns in the developing world nowadays, which lead to a lot of terrible disasters and social issues. While I agree that nowadays most people are not concerned enough about the environmental issues, I also think that there has been a lot of efforts made to prevent the natural habit from deteriorating. On the one hand, I think that there are two main reasons why people do not care about nature. Firstly, most people have beliefs that environmental issues will not affect their lives directly so they do not have to deal with them. For instance, global warming, which is becoming worse and worse nowadays, make the average temperature of the world rise but does not affect people lives as much as flood or typhoon does. Moreover, the lack of knowledge about nature also leads to the indifferences of humans to the natural habitat. It can be seen that most people were taught about the environment at schools, but they do not really understand it and just underestimate it. For example, with global warming and rising pollution, nature is getting worse and worse, meanwhile, humans just consider them as normal problems and believe that the next generation can easily deal with them. On the other hand, I believe that many people are also trying their best to protect the natural habitat. As we can see, many governments have implemented laws about nature and found many alternative sources to generate electricity like solar energy, wind energy, and tidal energy. Furthermore, there are now many organizations established to raise people's awareness about the environment like the green nature club, the oceanic protection, and so on. In conclusion, while I believe that people do not really care about the natural habitat where they are living because of the lack of knowledge, I do think that there has been a lot of effort made by governments and humans to prevent nature from being destroyed completely.
Environmental problems are
indeed
growing concerns in the developing world nowadays, which lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
terrible disasters and social issues. While I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that nowadays most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not concerned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
about the environmental issues, I
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that there has been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
efforts made to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
habit from deteriorating. On the one hand, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that there are two main reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not care about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
.
Firstly
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have beliefs that environmental issues will not affect their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
directly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
deal with them.
For instance
, global warming, which is becoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worse
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worse
nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the average temperature of the world rise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
does not affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
lives
as much as flood or typhoon does.
Moreover
, the lack of knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
also
leads to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
indifferences
of humans to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
habitat. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were taught
about the environment at schools,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they do not
really
understand it and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
underestimate it.
For example
, with global warming and rising pollution,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
is getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worse
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worse
, meanwhile, humans
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
consider them as normal problems and believe that the
next
generation can
easily
deal with them.
On the other hand
, I believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
also
trying their best to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
habitat. As we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
have implemented laws about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
and found
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
alternative sources to generate electricity like solar energy, wind energy, and tidal energy.
Furthermore
, there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
organizations established to raise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's awareness about the environment like the green
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
club, the oceanic protection, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
In conclusion
, while I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
really
care about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
habitat where they are living
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the lack of knowledge, I do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that there has been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
effort made by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and humans to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
from being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
completely.
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IELTS essay Nowadays most people do not care about the evironmental issues. What extend Give reasons for your answer

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
325 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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