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nowadays, more and more people are traveling to other countries, why is this happening? is this a negative or positive development?

nowadays, more and more people are traveling to other countries, why is this happening? is this a negative or positive development? QRo3P
There are a vast number of people traveling and visiting other nations these days. This can be caused by several reasons and personally, it is a beneficial development. To begin with, there are two contributing factors behind people’s motivation to travel. First, a number of them may want to learn more about unfamiliar cultures as during their trip, they are admissible to get exposed to local people and observe cultural differences here. This gives them a chance to make a comparison of cultural traits in various nations, which helps them enrich their knowledge and have a more profound understanding of the world. Second, a number of people decide to go on a trip to another nation consequently that they can visit their relatives or family members who live overseas. Video calls or photos only help them see each other’s faces without hugging or holding hands, and therefore, they desire to travel abroad to meet their beloved ones in flesh. I believe the prevalence of cross-border trips brings about tremendous beneficial effects on society. With a plethora of travelers coming to a country, the demand for housing and food here will likely grow. Local people can earn an enormous amount of money through providing shelters and selling their traditional cuisines. For instance, Vietnam is a country that welcomes nearly 20 million travelers from around the world annually, thanks to which the tourism industry here can flourish. Thousands of jobs have also been created, such as workers in travel agencies, taxi drivers or tour guides, to serve the huge total of international tourists. Therefore, a number of Vietnamese residents working in this industry have escaped poverty, avoided unemployment, and enjoyed a better quality of life. In conclusion, people these days' excursion across the border in order to acquire new knowledge and see one another. In my opinion, this development is beneficial due to its various social benefits.
There are a vast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
traveling and visiting other nations these days. This can
be caused
by several reasons and
personally
, it is a beneficial development.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are two contributing factors behind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
motivation to travel.
First
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of them may want to learn more about unfamiliar cultures as during their trip, they are admissible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
exposed to local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and observe cultural differences here. This gives them a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a comparison of cultural traits in various nations, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them enrich their knowledge and have a more profound understanding of the world. Second, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
decide to go on a trip to another nation
consequently
that they can visit their relatives or family members who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
overseas. Video calls or photos
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
each other’s faces without hugging or holding hands, and
therefore
, they desire to travel abroad to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their beloved ones in flesh.

I believe the prevalence of cross-border trips brings about tremendous beneficial effects on society. With a plethora of travelers coming to a country, the demand for housing and food here will likely grow. Local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can earn an enormous amount of money through providing shelters and selling their traditional cuisines.
For instance
, Vietnam is a country that welcomes
nearly
20 million travelers from around the world
annually
, thanks to which the tourism industry here can flourish. Thousands of jobs have
also
been created
, such as workers in travel agencies, taxi drivers or tour guides, to serve the huge total of international tourists.
Therefore
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of Vietnamese residents working in this industry have escaped poverty, avoided unemployment, and enjoyed a better quality of life.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
these days' excursion across the border in order to acquire new knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
one another. In my opinion, this development is beneficial due to its various social benefits.
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IELTS essay nowadays, more and more people are traveling to other countries, why is this happening? is this a negative or positive development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
315 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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