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Nowadays more and more people are becoming obese and less involved in sporting activities. What do you think are the causes and possible effects of this problem?

Nowadays more and more people are becoming obese and less involved in sporting activities. What do you think are the causes and possible effects of this problem? MoJma
There is no way around the fact that obesity has become a major disease prevalent among people in many countries in recent years. There are some reasons behind this problem, and it has led to a number of adverse effects. The primary reason for obesity is that many people have unhealthy eating habits. As the modern lifestyle is busier and more stressful than ever before, people tend to devote most of their time to work and leave no time to prepare meals for themselves. Therefore, they often trade their long-term health for the convenience of fast food. This kind of food is medically proved to contain a high proportion of fat and other harmful ingredients, which directly results in some serious health problems including obesity and various illnesses associated with it such as high blood pressure, diabetes and heart disease. Another factor contributing to obesity is the allure of technology. In the era of modern technology, people these days can have better access to the internet through smartphones and computers. Consequently, they may be addicted to playing games or social networks such as Facebook or Instagram rather than participating in physical exercise. Due to this sedentary lifestyle, considerable amounts of calories consumed every day cannot be converted into energy but accumulated in the body, causing obesity epidemics. In conclusion, the rise in obesity is caused by several factors including unhealthy diets and the sedentary modern lifestyle, and as a result, the rates of illnesses such as diabetes and heart disease have increased.
There is no way around the fact that obesity has become a major disease prevalent among
people
in
many
countries in recent years. There are
some
reasons behind this problem, and it has led to a number of adverse effects.

The primary reason for obesity is that
many
people
have unhealthy eating habits. As the modern lifestyle is busier and more stressful than ever
before
,
people
tend to devote most of their time to work and
leave
no time to prepare meals for themselves.
Therefore
, they
often
trade their long-term health for the convenience of
fast
food. This kind of food is
medically
proved to contain a high proportion of
fat
and other harmful ingredients, which
directly
results in
some
serious health problems including obesity and various illnesses associated with it such as high blood pressure, diabetes and heart disease.

Another factor contributing to obesity is the allure of technology. In the era of modern technology,
people
these days can have better access to the internet through smartphones and computers.
Consequently
, they may
be addicted
to playing games or social networks such as Facebook or Instagram
rather
than participating in physical exercise. Due to this sedentary lifestyle, considerable amounts of calories consumed every day cannot
be converted
into energy
but
accumulated in the body, causing obesity epidemics.

In conclusion
, the rise in obesity
is caused
by several factors including unhealthy diets and the sedentary modern lifestyle, and
as a result
, the rates of illnesses such as diabetes and heart disease have increased.
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IELTS essay Nowadays more and more people are becoming obese and less involved in sporting activities. What do you think are the causes and possible effects of this problem?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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