Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Nowadays many people have access to computers and a large number of children enjoy playing video games. What are the advantages and disadvantages of playing video games for children?

Nowadays many people have access to computers and a large number of children enjoy playing video games. What are the advantages and disadvantages of playing video games for children? O7Mk
The advent of technology in our everyday lives has improved every aspect of our routines: how we work, how we communicate and how we play games in our spare time. A relatively cheaper personal computer provides kids with the possibility to play multiple games online: from chess, to go, from virtual poker, to more complex games of strategy. In my opinion, a revolution of this kind brings its own advantages for kids, as it has been proved that games in general stimulate cognitive and thinking abilities and with video games, this opportunity is readily available. On the other hand, excess in time spent in front of a computer should be limited for the sake of the kid. Firstly, there is an abundance of video games that tend to stimulate strategy skills in very young kids. Finding a website that allows users to compete through chess or Go games is very easy today. These same games expose kids to the sense of fair competition and how to think in order to achieve a goal. Therefore, the advent of computers has not cancelled out the existence of these useful games; it has just made them available for a large number of people. At the same time, videogames can inspire children to the point that they become the starting point for a career in software engineering or related fields. Many computer scientists have chosen their path by being avid video game players, just like the founder of Google Deep Mind. On the other hand, exposure to excessively violent and banal games such as sports games should not be hindered but at least limited. Games of this kind tend to involve repetitive tasks that do not require much brain power, inducing children in a state of brain torpor while playing. In addition to the negative impact on the brains, such games can become addictive and be the source for complete waste of time. In conclusion, video games can bring their positive aspects, depending on the type of game a kid decides to play. It goes without saying that a good balance may be needed, given that children cannot only play strategy games during their free time. However, playing with games on the opposite side of the spectrum should be kept under control.
The advent of technology in our everyday
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
every aspect of our routines: how we work, how we communicate and how we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
in our spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. A
relatively
cheaper personal computer provides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
with the possibility to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
online: from chess, to go, from virtual poker, to more complex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
of strategy. In my opinion, a revolution of this kind brings its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
, as it has
been proved
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
in general
stimulate cognitive and thinking abilities and with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, this opportunity is
readily
available.
On the other hand
, excess in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
spent in front of a computer should
be limited
for the sake of the kid.

Firstly
, there is an abundance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
that tend to stimulate strategy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
. Finding a website that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
users to compete through chess or Go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. These same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
expose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to the sense of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
competition and how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
in order to achieve a goal.
Therefore
, the advent of computers has not cancelled out the existence of these useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
; it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
made them available for
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. At the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
videogames
can inspire children to the point that they become the starting point for a career in software engineering or related fields.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
computer scientists have chosen their path by being avid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
game players,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like the founder of Google Deep Mind.

On the other hand
, exposure to
excessively
violent and banal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
such as sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
should not
be hindered
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
at least limited.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Games
of this kind tend to involve repetitive tasks that do not require much brain power, inducing children in a state of brain torpor while playing.
In addition
to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the brains, such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
can become addictive and be the source for complete waste of time.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
can bring their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspects, depending on the type of game a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid
decides to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
. It goes without saying that a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
balance may
be needed
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
that children cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
strategy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
during their free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
However
, playing with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
on the opposite side of the spectrum should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
under control.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Nowadays many people have access to computers and a large number of children enjoy playing video games. What are the advantages and disadvantages of playing video games for children?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
378 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts