Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Nowadays it is commonly believed that main factors that affect a child's are development are pop culture and friends.

Nowadays it is commonly believed that main factors that affect a child's are development are pop culture and friends. 2KoMw
There are a lot of different aspects, that influence a child’s development. It is considered that the most influential parts of a child’s life are their own parents, while there are others, who think that social media, pop culture and friends have a much bigger influence over a child’s views. In my opinion, both are very important, but I believe that factors other than parents have a bigger impact on children’s development. On one hand, in the majority of cases parents are the most influential people in a child’s life, but that does not necessarily mean that they are also most influential factor overall. Kids like to idolize their parents; therefore, they will likely take their teachings very seriously. In my opinion most people who grew up with their fathers and mothers have very similar values and views in life as them. On the other hand, children tend to spend less and less time with their own parents, rather they spend the day in school, and are always online to communicate with their peers. Time spent on/with something/someone directly correlates with the influence it makes in an individual’s life. Also, children nowadays, even the youngest, spend more and more of their free time on social media and therefore it has a huge impact on their lives. Another contributing factor is, that older family members tend to be less understanding of newer technology and in most of the cases stop catching up with current pop culture, which makes it ever so harder to connect with their own children. Overall, I believe that parents should give children the freedom of forming their own beliefs, but they should also invest energy into better understanding their kid’s environment outside of their home, to be able to better protect them and guide them on their way to adulthood.
There are
a lot of
different
aspects, that influence a
child’s
development. It
is considered
that the most influential parts of a
child’s
life
are their
own
parents
, while there are others, who
think
that social media, pop culture and friends have a much bigger influence over a
child’s
views. In my opinion, both are
very
important
,
but
I believe that factors other than
parents
have a bigger impact on
children’s
development.

On one hand, in the majority of cases
parents
are the most influential
people
in a
child’s
life
,
but
that does not
necessarily
mean that they are
also
most
influential factor
overall
. Kids like to idolize their
parents
;
therefore
, they will likely take their teachings
very
seriously
. In my opinion most
people
who grew up with their fathers and mothers have
very
similar values and views in
life
as them.

On the other hand
,
children
tend to spend less and less time with their
own
parents
,
rather
they spend the day in school, and are always online to communicate with their peers. Time spent on/with something/someone
directly
correlates with the influence it
makes
in an individual’s
life
.
Also
,
children
nowadays, even the youngest, spend more and more of their free time on social media and
therefore
it has a huge impact on their
lives
. Another contributing factor is, that older family members tend to be less understanding of newer technology and in most of the cases
stop
catching up with
current
pop culture, which
makes
it ever
so
harder to connect with their
own
children.

Overall
, I believe that
parents
should give
children
the freedom of forming their
own
beliefs,
but
they should
also
invest energy into better understanding their kid’s environment
outside of
their home, to be able to better protect them and guide them on their way to adulthood.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Nowadays it is commonly believed that main factors that affect a child's are development are pop culture and friends.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic: