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Nowadays, having plastic surgeries are becoming increasingly popular. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

Nowadays, having plastic surgeries are becoming increasingly popular. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? 9BR5w
These days, many people are opting for plastic surgeries to change their appearance. While this can have some negatives, I believe they are far outweighed by the positives. There are several drawbacks associated with having plastic surgeries. One of them is the fact that the success rates of these operations are fairly low. This means that people who choose plastic surgeries often risk their natural appearance and health if the surgery goes wrong. In fact, there have been many instances where people particularly actors and singers who regret changing their looks through cosmetic surgeries. Another disadvantage might be the fact that if too many people go for changing their physical appearance, this may promote the ideology that the society today is for only good-looking people. This may result in social discrimination. Despite these downsides, I believe the benefits are more significant. One of the major advantages of being able to have a better look thanks to surgeries is the confidence boost and improved self-esteem. As we live in society where people are often judged by their appearance rather than personality traits, those who are less attractive feel isolated from the community. Because of this very reason, having a better look can maximize the chances of employment for a range of profession. In the cases of actors or singers, for example, attractiveness is one of the most important criteria as they often engage with the public and to draw other people’s attention, the exterior plays a part. In conclusion, although plastic surgeries can at times have disadvantages such as the fact that they are less successful and they can contribute to discrimination, I feel they are not as significant as the advantages which include increased confidence and employability. Advantage: boosts self-confidence Having a better look means more opportunities in terms of employment. Disadvantage: success rate is low and this can worsen the situation.
These days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are opting for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plastic
surgeries to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appearance
. While this can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
negatives, I believe they are far outweighed by the positives.

There are several drawbacks associated with having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plastic
surgeries. One of them is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fact
that the success rates of these operations are
fairly
low. This means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plastic
surgeries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
their natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appearance
and health if the surgery goes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fact
, there have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
instances where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
particularly
actors and singers who regret changing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
looks
through cosmetic surgeries. Another disadvantage might be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fact
that if too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
go for changing their physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appearance
, this may promote the ideology that the society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
-looking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This may result in social discrimination.

Despite these downsides, I believe the benefits are more significant. One of the major advantages of being able to have a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
thanks to surgeries is the confidence boost and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
self-esteem. As we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in society where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
judged by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appearance
rather
than personality traits, those who are less attractive feel isolated from the community.
Because of this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
reason, having a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
can maximize the chances of employment for a
Possible agreement error. The noun 'profession' seems to be countable; consider using: "range of professions".
range of profession
. In the cases of actors or singers,
for example
, attractiveness is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
criteria as they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
engage with the public and to draw other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
attention, the exterior plays a part.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plastic
surgeries can at times have disadvantages such as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fact
that they are less
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
successful and
they can contribute to discrimination, I feel they are not as significant as the advantages which include increased confidence and employability.

Advantage: boosts self-confidence

Having a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
look
means more opportunities in terms of employment.

Disadvantage: success rate is low and this can worsen the situation.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, having plastic surgeries are becoming increasingly popular. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
312 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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