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Nowadays, distance-learning programs have gained in popularity, but some people argue that courses can never be taken as good as those by attending a college or university in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

Nowadays, distance-learning programs have gained in popularity, but some people argue that courses can never be taken as good as those by attending a college or university in person. v. 2
The advent of the Internet has changed people’s lives and working patterns. These days, an increasing number of people are considering adopting distance education, a system that allows them to complete a degree at home. Although this kind of education has some differences with traditional college education, it has its own advantages. First of all, compared with traditional education, distance learning is more flexible, making it possible for more people to receive education. Students in distance-learning programs need to read relevant materials and they attend lectures by watching videos. When they have difficulties digesting the information given, they are free to push the pause button and replay the video as many times as they want, until they understand the content completely. Lectures in distance-education program are open 7/24 and it is therefore ideal for those who lead a hectic life, as long as they have access to the Internet. In addition, as the distance education developing, interaction opportunities between students and lecturers are provided. Students can now use tools provided in the virtual classroom or send emails to ask questions. In this way, they can gain guidance from lecturers and finish the lectures with higher quality. Sometimes, they can even communicate with scholars from worldwide prestigious universities while they are at home. One of the main drawbacks of such type of learning is that students have few chances to improve their soft skills, considering that group assignments are usually not included. Normally, distance-learning students complete their degrees on their own and hence they can hardly make new friends. As a result, their network of contacts cannot be expanded, which has a negative effect on their career development. Distant education makes higher education more available, thanks to its flexibility. However, it does have some flaws, such as the lack of interaction, which make it unable to produce the same learning outcome as that of traditional college education.
The advent of the Internet has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and working patterns. These days, an increasing number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are considering adopting distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, a system that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to complete a degree at home. Although this kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
differences with traditional college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, it has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, compared with traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, distance learning is more flexible, making it possible for more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
in distance-learning programs need to read relevant
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
materials and
they attend lectures by watching videos. When they have difficulties digesting the information
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
, they are free to push the pause button and replay the video as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
times as they want, until they understand the content completely. Lectures in distance-education program are open 7/24 and it is
therefore
ideal for those who lead a hectic life, as long as they have access to the Internet.

In addition
, as the distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
developing, interaction opportunities between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and lecturers
are provided
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
tools provided in the virtual classroom or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
emails to ask questions. In this way, they can gain guidance from lecturers and finish the lectures with higher quality.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, they can even communicate with scholars from worldwide prestigious universities while they are at home.

One of the main drawbacks of such type of learning is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have few chances to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, considering that group assignments are
usually
not included.
Normally
, distance-learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
complete their degrees on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
and
hence
they can hardly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new friends.
As a result
, their network of contacts cannot
be expanded
, which has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on their career development.

Distant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
more available, thanks to its flexibility.
However
, it does have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
flaws, such as the lack of interaction, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it unable to produce the same learning outcome as that of traditional college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, distance-learning programs have gained in popularity, but some people argue that courses can never be taken as good as those by attending a college or university in person. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
316 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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