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Now-a-days people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of the news. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Now-a-days people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of the news. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? 5exB
we live in the 21st century, which is known for its globalization. Because of the recent development of technology people use social media and other means of communication just to connect with other people and world news. Some people believe that the use of social media has a negative impact on society while others believe that it will bring more positivity to society. This essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend. on one hand, people assert that social media brings lots of pros to people. first of all, because of social media people able to meet their relatives and friends who live far from them. For example, recent advancements in technology in the communication field, mobile applications such as skype, what's app and snap chat have become an integral part of people's lives. social media brings awareness into the community. News can spread to every corner of countries within the second. on the other hand, social media also has some disadvantages such as people already reduced face-to-face communication with their relatives and friends. It can be seen that people has become selfish and self-centred. In past, people like to meet each other for festivals, however, nowadays people wish each other on social media and avoid physical meetings.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the 21st century, which
is known
for its globalization.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the recent development of technology
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and
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other
means of communication
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to connect with
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other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and world news.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
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social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has a
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negative
impact on society while others believe that it will bring more positivity to society. This essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
assert that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
brings lots of pros to
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people
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
first of all
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their relatives and friends who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
far from them.
For example
, recent advancements in technology in the communication field, mobile applications such as skype, what's app and snap chat have become an integral part of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
brings awareness into the community. News can spread to every corner of countries within the second.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the
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other
hand,
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social
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media
also
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
already
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
face-to-face communication with their relatives and friends. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
become selfish and
Possible spelling mistake found.
self-centred
.
Did you mean: "In the past"?
In past
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
for festivals,
however
, nowadays
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people
wish each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and avoid physical meetings.

IELTS essay Now-a-days people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of the news. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
210 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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