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narrative essay about a trip you will never forget.

narrative essay about a trip you will never forget. m8KLL
I have visited many places in my country. Traveling is my passion and it is very interesting to me. In the past, when I was just a little girl about seven ages, I used to go to the most beautiful and largest city in Vietnam. It is Ho Chi Minh City. It is a beautiful and interesting place to go. Ho Chi Minh City have been a modern, civilized city at that time and up to the present. The reason why I had an opportunity to travel to Ho Chi Minh City is that my parents had to go to work and I could go too. After a long sleep in the coach, I awoke from sleep with a surprised face. Every changed in front of my eyes, roads, houses, trees, were all different from my hometown. The wide roads with many moving vehicles. There were cars, bicycles and even trains, which I could see almost exclusively in pictures. The houses have been built next to each other, there are five floors, seven floors, ten floors and more. It absolutely was my first time seeing such tall buildings. For me, it is a different picture that makes me feel loved and excited to experience a big city. After going off the coach, I rested in my uncle’s house. The next day, my uncle took me to the children’s play area. There, I took part in a lot of interesting games. In addition, I even got to see elephants and giraffes there and I also got to feed an elephant with a piece of sugarcane. After that, my uncle took me to the water park, there was an extremely large lake and many other games, people called that big lake is an artificial sea. It contained a hundred people. I played some water games, such as swimming and water polo. In the evening I got to eat a barbecue with my uncle and my parents at a fancy restaurant with food that was probably the first time I had ever tasted it. It was a great day with many memorable activities. I ended the trip with full of emotions, happy and sad. Happy to know more new and interesting things. Sad to have to go away this very happy and beautiful place. Perhaps Ho Chi Minh City could be a city that is not very strange to us today. To me, it is a place that gives the foremost memorable memories. Because it was my first time going to a developed place and playing many modern games.
I have visited
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
in my country. Traveling is my passion and it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
to me. In the past, when I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
girl about seven ages, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to go to the most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and largest city in Vietnam. It is Ho Chi Minh City. It is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
to go. Ho Chi Minh City have been a modern, civilized city at that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and up to the present.

The reason why I had an opportunity to travel to Ho Chi Minh City is that my parents had to go to work and I could go too. After a long sleep in the coach, I awoke from sleep with a surprised face. Every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in front of my eyes, roads,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
, trees, were all
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from my hometown. The wide roads with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
moving vehicles. There were cars, bicycles and even trains, which I could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
almost exclusively in pictures. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
have
been built
next
to each other, there are five floors, seven floors, ten floors and more. It
absolutely
was my
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
seeing such tall buildings. For me, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
picture that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me feel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
and excited to experience a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
city.

After going off the coach, I rested in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uncle’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. The
next
day, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uncle
took me to the children’s play area. There, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
took part
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
In addition
, I even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
elephants and giraffes there and I
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to feed an elephant with a piece of sugarcane. After that, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uncle
took me to the water park, there was an
extremely
large lake and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
called that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
lake is an artificial sea. It contained a hundred
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. I played
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, such as swimming and water polo. In the evening I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to eat a barbecue with my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uncle
and my parents at a fancy restaurant with food that was
probably
the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I had ever tasted it. It was a great day with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
memorable activities.

I ended the trip with full of emotions, happy and sad. Happy to know more new and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
things. Sad to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go away this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
happy and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
. Perhaps Ho Chi Minh City could be a city
that is
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
strange to us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. To me, it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
that gives the foremost memorable memories.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
it was my
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
going to a developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
and playing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
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IELTS essay narrative essay about a trip you will never forget.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
426 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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