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Museums and art galleries are past their use-by date. In modern society, culture and art are best accessed online by computers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Museums and art galleries are past their use-by date. In modern society, culture and art are best accessed online by computers. wBOrn
Internet is a part of information revolution which does not only allow people to connect to each other, but also empower people to access to an enormous mass of data. By using internet, a person no longer needs to visit a museum or art gallery but still able to enjoy or study of culture and art which raises a question that whether the existence of museum and art galleries are no longer needed. In my view, museum and art are irreplaceable and they shall continuously keep a crucial role in society for a long time. Firstly, it is obvious that enjoying art and culture in museum or gallery brings multidimensional multi-sensory experience to the guests. This means that a guest could obtain more memorable experience in art gallery than simply looking at a picture online. Attending at exhibition room, the visitors are able to observe details and textures of the artefacts then discuss to each other about what they are concerned, which brings an interactive and communicative environment to the visitors, the environment internet does not offer. Moreover, the organisation and arrangement of artifacts in museums or art galleries are systematic and effective which helps visitors take less effort to study. For example, surfing and gathering random information about an artist on internet must be a hard work and also take time to classify or summarise information. In contrast, a gallery owner would classify artworks into categories such as year, theme, artist and each artwork is also attached with additional information so it can be studied in a systematic way. That is not to say that studying culture and art on internet is not beneficial. Indeed, internet is an economical and convenient way to study any particular field. Although internet does not always bring to learner a reliable, systematic information, it is a helpful tool for seeking knowledge which can be combined with studying in museums and art galleries for more effective study. In sum, visiting museums or art galleries not only offers visitors an ideal environment to obtain knowledge but also gives them the chance to interact with each other. Meanwhile, seeking information on internet is still a convenient way which is partialy supportive for studying in the desirable field. By doing so, studiers would find their own suitable ways to study art and culture.
Internet is a part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
revolution which does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to connect to each other,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
empower
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to access to an enormous mass of data. By using internet, a person no longer needs to visit a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gallery
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
still
able to enjoy or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
which raises a question that whether the existence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
are no longer needed. In my view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
irreplaceable and
they shall
continuously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a crucial role in society for a long time.

Firstly
, it is obvious that enjoying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gallery
brings multidimensional multi-sensory experience to the guests. This means that a guest could obtain more memorable experience in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gallery
than
simply
looking at a picture online. Attending at exhibition room, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
are able to observe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
and textures of the
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
then discuss to each other about what they
are concerned
, which brings an interactive and communicative environment to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
, the environment internet does not offer.

Moreover
, the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
and arrangement of artifacts in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
are systematic and effective which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
take less effort to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
For example
, surfing and gathering random
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
about an artist on internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and
also
take time to classify or
Possible spelling mistake. 'summarise' is British English.
summarise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
In contrast
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gallery
owner would classify artworks into categories such as year, theme, artist and each artwork is
also
attached with additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it can
be studied
Consider replacing "in a systematic way" with the adverb for "systematic"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a systematic way
.

That is
not to say that studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
on internet is not beneficial.
Indeed
, internet is an economical and convenient way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
any particular field. Although internet does not always bring to learner a reliable, systematic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, it is a helpful tool for seeking knowledge which can
be combined
with studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
for more effective study.

In sum, visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
offers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
an ideal environment to obtain knowledge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
gives them the chance to interact with each other. Meanwhile, seeking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on internet is
still
a convenient way which is
Possible spelling mistake found.
partialy
supportive for studying in the desirable field. By doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
studiers
would find their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
suitable ways to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
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IELTS essay Museums and art galleries are past their use-by date. In modern society, culture and art are best accessed online by computers.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
386 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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